2013 losses- rainbow baby making thread...

[AwesomeSauce]

Awesome Sauce, my GP said they normally advise to wait a couple of cycles because it's easier to date the pregnancy.

I get that, but they can use their damn ultrasound to date a pregnancy. I am not waiting unless there is a physical reason to wait kwim.

 

[AwesomeSauce]

One thing I really struggle with is people telling me to just be grateful for my kids or that I already have kids and don't need more.

Those comments make me feel like they think I am not grateful for my children. My children are my heart. They are precious and amazing people. I a, forever grateful for them. They have proven to me that there is good in the world, and I do not feel that my family is yet complete. My children are the reason I want another child. I know how amazing children are in my life. Losing my baby was devastating, partly because I know exactly what I lost. I know what a precious life was lost. Who is someone else to tell me that I am wrong to want another?

 

[Hippielove]

One thing I really struggle with is people telling me to just be grateful for my kids or that I already have kids and don't need more.

Those comments make me feel like they think I am not grateful for my children. My children are my heart. They are precious and amazing people. I a, forever grateful for them. They have proven to me that there is good in the world, and I do not feel that my family is yet complete. My children are the reason I want another child. I know how amazing children are in my life. Losing my baby was devastating, partly because I know exactly what I lost. I know what a precious life was lost. Who is someone else to tell me that I am wrong to want another?

I know exactly how you feel. I have had people say the same thing to me.

 

[Raggydoll]

Awesome Sauce, my GP said they normally advise to wait a couple of cycles because it's easier to date the pregnancy.

I get that, but they can use their damn ultrasound to date a pregnancy. I am not waiting unless there is a physical reason to wait kwim.

I know. That's why I decided to TTC once the bleeding stopped. I'd already had a fair wait by then as I bled for nearly 7 weeks.

One thing I really struggle with is people telling me to just be grateful for my kids or that I already have kids and don't need more.

Those comments make me feel like they think I am not grateful for my children. My children are my heart. They are precious and amazing people. I a, forever grateful for them. They have proven to me that there is good in the world, and I do not feel that my family is yet complete. My children are the reason I want another child. I know how amazing children are in my life. Losing my baby was devastating, partly because I know exactly what I lost. I know what a precious life was lost. Who is someone else to tell me that I am wrong to want another?

I totally agree. It feel odd when people say that. It's like saying I would have loved this baby less as its my second child.

I realise everyday how lucky I am to have my little girl but it does not make the loss any less.

I think people are so awkward when talking about MC. The worst I've had is "at least you can have a drink now" I mean seriously

 

[LucyLake]

One thing I really struggle with is people telling me to just be grateful for my kids or that I already have kids and don't need more.

Those comments make me feel like they think I am not grateful for my children. My children are my heart. They are precious and amazing people. I a, forever grateful for them. They have proven to me that there is good in the world, and I do not feel that my family is yet complete. My children are the reason I want another child. I know how amazing children are in my life. Losing my baby was devastating, partly because I know exactly what I lost. I know what a precious life was lost. Who is someone else to tell me that I am wrong to want another?

Thank you!!

I have family members who have told me to get over it. My mom who had 3 children--2 girls and a boy in fact. She thinks I should be content with my one 8 year old. She doesn't understand that he'll have no nieces or nephews, no one to help him when me and my husband pass on, and that I really don't want to have an empty nest in exactly tee minus 10 years!

 

[Nimyra]

My mom says that all the time, "well, just be grateful for M (dd)" Um, I *AM* grateful for my daughter. She is my world. And I don't want her to be an only child (well technically she has half siblings but they are grown).

Anyway, as for me, I'm out for the month. Traveling to California to meet with my daughter's donor was crazy stressful. I'm negotiating with a new local donor and hoping to move forward working with him this month.

I'm feeling down, but managing.

 

[GalvanBaby]

Hi ladies, I lost my angel at 6 weeks almost 2 weeks ago. I am on BCP this month due to an ovarian cyst, but will be TTCing again in May. Since my MC, 6 people around me have announced their pregnancy so I am very down about this still. I pray for my rainbow baby next month.

 

[AwesomeSauce]

Hugs galvanbaby. I get it. I have felt it.

For me it isn't that I begrudge others their happiness. I don't. Two days ago my sister in law announced another pregnancy. I am happy for her, but her happiness reminds me of my sadness. I don't mean to be sad about other people having happy news. That kind of news is just intimately tied to my own sadness.

 

[george83]

My mom says that all the time, "well, just be grateful for M (dd)" Um, I *AM* grateful for my daughter. She is my world. And I don't want her to be an only child (well technically she has half siblings but they are grown).

Anyway, as for me, I'm out for the month. Traveling to California to meet with my daughter's donor was crazy stressful. I'm negotiating with a new local donor and hoping to move forward working with him this month.

I'm feeling down, but managing.

I'm so sorry things aren't easier for you, I used to get frustrated if my oh didn't want to try on a day we'd agreed on but I can not imagine what this must be like for you, sending you massive hugs

 

[george83]

Hi ladies, I lost my angel at 6 weeks almost 2 weeks ago. I am on BCP this month due to an ovarian cyst, but will be TTCing again in May. Since my MC, 6 people around me have announced their pregnancy so I am very down about this still. I pray for my rainbow baby next month.

I'm really sorry about your loss and that you have so many pregnant people around you, I lost my baby at 9 weeks and spent the next few weeks dreading some body making that announcement

 

[GalvanBaby]

Thanks ladies. It is one of the hardest things to go through.

Nimyra: I have been told the same thing by too many people. I have 2 kids and they all think I should be grateful for them and to let nature take its course, if I get pregnant, I get pregnant. If it sticks, it sticks, If not, oh well. I have told them that while I respect their opinion, this is my life and my body. I unfortunately have only 1 tube that works. We have been TTC for 13 months and are on cycle 17. I have had 2 CPs and 1 MC. So, while letting nature take its course might be good for some, it won't work for me. It hurts to hear it. My SIL tried for 3 years and just got her BFP in December naturally, she is due in August. She is the one who told me all of this. I reminded her last time that she was getting ready to go for treatment when she got pregnant.

 

[LucyLake]

Nimyra and NeverEnding, I cried when I read that you got your AF's and are out I have been trying to be positive, but I must admit that this made me upset. It seems like very few of us are getting after the MC and I just thought it would be easier than this. I'm staying up until about 10 pm Nimyra if you want to talk

Welcome Mrs.BroodyPant, GalvanBaby, and Peach Daisy. My thoughts are with you and I'm sorry for each of your losses

 

[LucyLake]

Is anyone else just feeling extremely down and out and overall pretty negative? This should be a very exciting time as my period is almost over and it's time to get started. But, I can't help but be pessimistic today....

It just seems like so few of us are getting a after the recent losses...

And if ladies are, they are having another loss. I've actually cried in recent days reading about recurrent miscarriages here with newly pregnant ladies.

It just seems like SO much work.

1) Recover physically from recent loss (still not fully recovered, short 25 day cycle now)
2) get husband onboard and in agreement
3) Pray that I took enough B-12, ate correctly, to get a
4) Pray that the BFP if I'm lucky to get one, sticks
5) Wait and wait and wait and wait for anything and everything to go wrong.

I think this may end up being the longest year of my life. It's been 60 days since the MC itself and it feels like a lifetime.

Anyone else having these feelings?

I took for granted how easy and amazing pregnancy was with my sweet 8 yr old son.

 

[LucyLake]

Thanks ladies. It is one of the hardest things to go through.

Nimyra: I have been told the same thing by too many people. I have 2 kids and they all think I should be grateful for them and to let nature take its course, if I get pregnant, I get pregnant. If it sticks, it sticks, If not, oh well. I have told them that while I respect their opinion, this is my life and my body. I unfortunately have only 1 tube that works. We have been TTC for 13 months and are on cycle 17. I have had 2 CPs and 1 MC. So, while letting nature take its course might be good for some, it won't work for me. It hurts to hear it. My SIL tried for 3 years and just got her BFP in December naturally, she is due in August. She is the one who told me all of this. I reminded her last time that she was getting ready to go for treatment when she got pregnant.

This post literally hurt to read. I'm so sorry your SIL told you that GalvanBaby It's incredibly frustrating to me how quickly people forget their own struggles when everything finally goes their way. I've seen it with other ladies too, where they get a and a baby growing properly and it's like their MC never even happened. They even have the nerve to act like you're crazy for mourning. I'm sorry about your one tube issue and my thoughts are with you as you TTC Praying for a sticky for you really soon

 

[GalvanBaby]

Thanks LucyLake. I really could not believe half the things I have been told since my MC. My 18 year old SIL tried to tell me that I lost the baby because of so much fertility meds. I had only been on them for one month when I got my BFP. I told her to get married and try to get pregnant and if God forbid she has to use fertility meds to remember what she told me because I know of so many women who have their lil miracles because of meds.

I hope you get your sticky this cycle. I was predicted by Cheri22 a boy in June. I am not too quick to believe this stuff as I sent it in for fun. She did describe my 2 kids on the dot though so we shall see.

 

[LucyLake]

I'd give anything for some meds right now with my 25 day cycle this month which indicates some possible luteal phase issues. I really and truly hope your SIL never has to walk this long and winding road. I wonder if she'd talk this way at 30 with more experience and wisdom under her belt? Probably not!

Big hugs

 

[GalvanBaby]

I was diagnosed with a LP defect. Now, I am on injectables, trigger, and progesterone.

I was thinking that I have too many SILs with too many screwed up opinions. LOL I have 5 SILs! Add them to a weird MIL and we have hell!! Too bad I live 1 block from 2 SILs and MIL. I need to move.

 

[AustinGigi]

Lost my little bean this morning. 4 weeks 4 days. I feel so incredibly sad, but determined to try again. Hopefully, I'll get to see my bean one day.

Going to the Dr. on Monday for a checkup and then we'll see what the verdict is on when we can try again. I'm 34 so I'm anxious to keep at it.

Thank you so much for this site. Y'all are truly a blessing here.

 

[GalvanBaby]

I am so sorry for your loss AustinGigi.

 

[LucyLake]

Hi AustinGigi and welcome. I'm also 34 and sorry for your loss. Though I have one amazing son who is 8, I truly feel time is not on my side right now and would like to get pregnant again before my 35th birthday in November and the doctor's you're old! you need an amnio! kind of orders.

GalvanBaby, you totally need to move. OMG!! I'd be losing my mind if an SIL lived that close!