August loss thread - TTC our rainbows!

[Vicky_92]

Aayla well done for the weight loss. Glad you had a good day today

Hi Claire. I'm so sorry for your loss. I can't personally don't see a line, but I'm not great at that. GL tho will be keeping FX.

 

[ClaireZac30]

Thanks for replying girls. This is the first time for me on a chat forum but I've been reading them constantly since my miscarriage and I've found them a real comfort. I just did an Internet cheapy and got the beginnings of a line too I think - lol I can't help myself. I think I'm right on the edge of something. Well hoping I am!

 

[Aayla]

Hi Claire! Welcome. I don't see a line on my computer but I will try again on my phone. I can turn the brightness up and sometimes will see one then.

8/9dpo is very early so having light lines, if any at all, is fine. it takes hcg about 48 hours to double so tests don't tend to darken much in just 24 hours. If you can afford it keep testing, or wait a couple of more days to test again.

 

[LoraLoo]

I see a hint of something on that too! I reckon tomorrow y get s good line!
I'm so sorry for your loss, ive found this forum, in particular this thread, a greT source of comfort and support x

 

[ClaireZac30]

I'm sure there's something ever so slight! I'm trying not to get excited as I don't want to be disappointed. I've got a lot of symptoms to support a positive hpt - some familiar ones (bleeding gums and sore boobs) and some new (itchy nipples and bad heartburn which I NEVER suffer with). I think all you ladies are amazing - you're all such a support for one another.

 

[Sweety21]

Hi Claire,

I am sorry for your loss and you are most welcome to join us.
About HPT I do see a line on Frer. But, I have seen indent lines before. So, not sure if that's really positive or just indent. But, if you see it and it's pink then for sure you are pregnant. I can't see anything on ic though.

 

[Aayla]

Claire: I looked on my phone and I see a line on the FRER. Not sure about the ic. maybe a hint of something but I can't say yes for sure. Have you tested again?

 

[ClaireZac30]

Hi,

Yes I've tested again today but I wouldn't say the FRER has got much darker but there's definitely a line still (see pic). I also did a Superdrug 10ml test and I thought I could see a faint positive so ripped it open and its dried much darker (will send a pic) in a mo.

I've been cramping a lot today like AF is coming and pinching in my left ovary. My period is still not due for a week - I'm only 10dpo today.

I also have had some creamy very stretch cm with a red streak in just now - could that be implantation bleeding?

 

[ClaireZac30]

Here's the pic of my superdrug 10ml test

 

[ClaireZac30]

Ahhhh - posted the wrong FRER pic. Here's the correct one:

 

[danser55]

mrsmac yay congrats on team blue!!!

CD1 is finally today I go for a blood work and u/s on Wednesday, if all looks good I start the drugs for the IUI this cycle.

 

[Aayla]

So I am going off of the provera whether the doc likes it or not. The mood swing side effect has reared its ugly head. I lost it on hubby for not texting me back and went so far to accuse him of cheating on me. Never in our 9 years have I ever thought or had an inkling of him cheating or even thinking of it. This is not good. So we both made the decision that I need to stop the pills.

I've had bad reactions before and my previous RE told me that if I find myself having really bad swings that I should call them. I never got to call my doc today but I will be tomorrow morning.

Since my bmi is not down to where it needs to be for iui, I am just going to wait for af to come and then go on femara as per usual.

 

[Aayla]

I am down 6 lbs in 7 days!! Holy crap.

 

[danser55]

I am down 6 lbs in 7 days!! Holy crap.

Yay that's great!

 

[Vicky_92]

Happy days Aayla well done. Was hoping yous lovely ladies could maybe help me. I'm approaching my first due date of the first miscarriage last year on the 18th of April. And I'm literally falling apart. I'm always crying now and I think the stress of starting to ttc again is making it worse. I should be 38 weeks pregnant but I'm now just thinking of trying again. And then I have two more due dates ahead of this because I had my miscarriages so close together. Help 😢

 

[Aayla]

I haven't approached mine yet so I'm not sure what I would do. I think it's okay to grieve. maybe do a little something to say goodbye. It's not traditional or at least talked about with early miscarriage but it is a loss. Maybe light a candle, say a prayer to the baby, to god, to the universe...just a few words. cry your eyes out. You will be sad but try to focus on the here and now. And when the next one comes do the same thing. Hopefully you will be pregnant again but even if you are that doesn't mean these dates don't mean something to you and you can't still grieve the loss.

 

[Aayla]

AFM: I am on cd 1 today. I start the letrozole again on friday. It's good to back TTC again. Speaking of due dates. mine is coming up as well. May 4. Star Wars day. I was so excited because my hubby is such a geek and it would have been awesome to have that day as its bday.

Speaking in optimistic terms: if I do get pregnant this cycle then I will be testing just before Mother's day (It's May 8 - second Sunday in May - in Canada) and my bday is May 12. I would love to have a very happy birthday and mother's day.

 

[Aayla]

Well I am F***ing gutted. Doc said no letrozole. We must do a biopsy and get the results back so I now have to sit through this freaking cycle doing absolutely nothing. Which sucks because that means I have to go back on the provera to induce it close to the end of this cycle because it doesn't come on its own. My biopsy is on the 12th. My thought is to bypass his orders and take it anyway on cd 5-9 instead of 3-7. Not sure what the difference will be since I ovulate late anyway.

But I just don't know. I want so bad to be TTC right now, not just because I want a baby but my due date is coming up and my birthday and mother's day (all within a week of each other). Even if I wasn't pregnant at least I know I was trying. But to sit here and do nothing and then have my cycle start again just before my bday sucks.

My only positive thought with doing what the doc says is that it gives me that month to lose more weight. But I know I won't be down to IUI weight by then. That is a 50 lb loss and I won't be doing that in a month. That would be a 1.5 lb loss per day.

My mom says that I should just go ahead and do it. What if I was ovulating on my own? There is no chance of my ovulating by the time the biopsy is and so certainly no chance of being pregnant. I know that if the hyperplasia is back they will want to put me back on progesterone. Or hell..I may need a hysterectomy. Ideally that is what they wanted but I want kids.

I'm so conflicted. and mom is afraid I will lose my momentum if I just have to sit here and wait. When I get depressed it is hard to stay motivated. Right now I just want to eat ice cream and cry.

 

[Mrsmac02]

Happy days Aayla well done. Was hoping yous lovely ladies could maybe help me. I'm approaching my first due date of the first miscarriage last year on the 18th of April. And I'm literally falling apart. I'm always crying now and I think the stress of starting to ttc again is making it worse. I should be 38 weeks pregnant but I'm now just thinking of trying again. And then I have two more due dates ahead of this because I had my miscarriages so close together. Help 😢

Big hugs hon, it's such a tough time.

My EDD came and went but it was DH's birthday so I didn't do anything special if that makes sense. I think it was easier because I am lucky enough to be pregnant again.

One of my close friends suffered a loss a few years back and when I talked to her, she said she marked it the first year for some kind of closure. She and her hubby went for a walk up the hills and took a little polished rock she'd bought. She left it up there, kind of as a memorial she said xxx

 

[mod19]

Hey guys can I join you? I had a loss back in August and took a break from bnb till last month. At the time dd was only 4 months old and I was 9 weeks along with a blightened ovum before throwing in the towel and having a d&c to remove the "pregnancy" along with a grapefruit sized cyst. At the time we found out I was pregnant dd was only 2 months old and I wasn't ready for another baby, so in a weird twisted way things worked out I guess. But now we're ready and this was our 1st month ttc. I'm currently in the tww and am 5dpo. Everytime I've been pregnant I just knew. I felt weird for having a beer and would stop after one. I thought about having one after work yesterday, but on my drive home a little voice in my head told me it wouldn't be a good idea. I hope that means good things.

Mrs Mac most sure if you remember me or not, but I believe we were going through something similar at the same time. I see you are expecting a lil blue bundle...congrats!