August loss thread - TTC our rainbows!

[Aayla]

The clinic called about my results. They are concerned. I explained to them my cycles and what I think happened. Trying to explain why I went for my progesterone test on cd 25 and not 21 was exhausting. They don't seem to believe that I ovulate around cd 19. but I explained that I temp and that's how I know. So they are giving the info to my doc and we will see what he says. 7.5mg is the highest dose they give. He may want me to come in for an ultrasound. I am hoping he allows me one more cycle without a cold to see if I have become resistant to it or it was just an off month. Also by Tuesday I will know what is going on with my temps.

it is possible my weight has contributed to this as well. The more weight you have the less these drugs work and I have gained quite a bit of weight in the last year. I have been struggling to lose it for awhile. If this is the case they may cut me off and if I can't be on letrozole or it doesn't work then I will have to go on the Mirena until I get my weight down to try again.

I don't know what is next if fertility drugs fail. Do I need these drugs for IVF? They have to grow the egg somehow. But alas. IVF is very expensive here...$16,000 for one shot. and they won't do it at my weight. I would need to lose at least 100 lbs.

I hate this limbo. I hate not knowing what the plan is.

 

[Mrsmac02]

I'm sorry Aayla, this must all be so hard

Forgive me for being blunt and writing a huge essay but I think you've pretty much answered your own question - if your weight is contributing to resistance to the drugs etc then you must focus on your weight.

I know from painful personal experience how much excessive weight contributes to infertility.

This is long so bear with me...!

I was 6-7 stones (I think about 90/100lbs) overweight when my periods stopped. I was never slim but when I met my now husband, I gained an enormous amount of weight in about 2/3 years just through eating out/takeaways and working funny shifts (and being incredibly happy!!)

I went through a whole heap of tests and they found wasn't ovulating and nothing I did helped. This went on for three years and the doctors couldn't get things working again with drugs (clomid didn't work at all). They always did mention that my weight could be a factor but I didn't want to admit it. Losing weight seemed like a bit job that I wasn't that into. So I had kinda resigned myself to the fact that it would be very difficult and put it to the back of my mind as I wasn't planning on TTC for a few more years.

But when we got engaged, I told myself I wanted to lose weight so I would feel great in my wedding dress, nothing to do with babies, more that I didn't want to look back at my photos and regret them.

I focused really really hard on diet and exercise and in 10 months, I lost 4 and a bit stone (61lbs). During that time my periods came back, sporadically at first but by three months before I got married, my GP suggested agnus castus to regulate my cycles and my moods more. And it worked - within six weeks of being married, I was pregnant Ben.

Second time around i'd put some of the weight back on so again sorted out diet and exercise for a couple of months, lost 18lbs, took agnus castus for three months and again, success.

I know you've got a number of things going on that are contributing to infertility but weight I'm sure won't be helping.

And I also know how tough it is to lose weight. But if it helps, it is so worth it.

I hope you don't feel like I'm lecturing you - you're a smart lady so I'm sure you know what the problems are and why. But I just thought sharing my experience might give you a bit of hope that you might be able to increase your chances by losing even a little weight

 

[Sweety21]

Aayla,I won't lie by saying I get it or understand your situation because I have always been 23-24bmi person But, what you are going through is difficult. If it's difficult financially than it's better to start doing what you can do by not investing anywhere.
Mrsmac shared her experience which is very inspiring but, it's definitely not easy to loose few stones. But, with little dedication you can do it.
We are here to support you whenever you need help.

 

[Mrsmac02]

It really isn't, it's so so tough to get started but keeping motivated when things don't chance as quickly as you want them to is horrible. It's so easy to give up (and I did, many times)

But I told myself if I stuck at it for a week it would be an achievement. Then my goal was a fortnight and then a month. Before I knew it I was actually enjoying going to dance classes, walking, swimming. Couldn't believe it - I've never ever ever been into sport or physical activity.

Of course I'm a hypocrite and I've let it all go in the last six months but if I can do it once, I can do it again! X

 

[Aayla]

Awe you guys. It didn't feel like lecturing at all. I love hearing successful experiences. While losing weight won't get me to ovulate on my own (I was 160 lbs at 18 when I was told I had PCOS) it will help the meds work infinitely better.

You're right. I know what to do and I have been a petulant lazy ass child about it all. Tomorrow I have to go grocery shopping and plan on buying only good stuff. I have the perfect program that has given me massive success each time I do it. But this now has to be a way of life for me. To stop means putting it back on. And I am tired of being fat and damn it I want to be a mom.

Thank you all for the support. It means so much to me.

 

[Mrsmac02]

It's funny, we could probably be the best dietitians in the world because we KNOW what to do. It's just doing it that is the problem!!

I read somewhere that if you do something continuously for 21 days, it will become a habit. I say if you can stick to your plan for 3 weeks, you're onto a winner.

I'll be rooting for you! And then when this baby arrives I'll be joining you

 

[Aayla]

Thanks!!

I weighed myself today. 323.8 Not quite the highest weight I have been but it only a 0.2 difference unfortunately.

For me to first get on the pills they wanted me at 279. and that was the the cut off. I have gained 44.8 lbs in the last year. Quite literally as I started my first cycle on letrozole May 24, 2015.

wow...isn't that a wake up call. So it could be my weight that has done this. except that I have been this weight for the last few months. It hasn't really changed much. Maybe by 10 lbs. Most of the weight I put on after the mc.

temp dropped today. I don't have a good feeling.

 

[danser55]

So many hugs for you Aayla.

I wanted to come and update, we had a u/s this morning at 7 weeks ish it was our 3rd u/s. Only today did my RE notice Baby B. Yup there are twins. I am still in complete show and trying to process that.

 

[Mrsmac02]

Eeeeeekkk!!!!! OMG, that's amazing news danser! I am so rooting for you little guys, I hope all continues to go well!

How are you feeling so far? X

 

[Aayla]

Squeeeeee! TWINS!! Oh Danser that is awesome. Congrats!!!

 

[danser55]

Eeeeeekkk!!!!! OMG, that's amazing news danser! I am so rooting for you little guys, I hope all continues to go well!

How are you feeling so far? X

I feel so exhausted and so nausea, but I am so grateful for every minute of it. As odd as that sounds. Thank you. How are you doing?

 

[kakae]

Wow congratulations Dander, that's amazing news!!! I bet you're in shock, what a blessing though!

So sorry Aayla, that completely sucks. Hopefully they have answers for you and a plan soon. I know how frustrated you're no doubt feeling, hang in there.

To everyone else, I can't believe some of you are in your second and third trimesters, that's gone so fast! We need scan pics please!

AFM I took last month off, dtd when we felt like it but that was all. I started spotting on 9dpo and got terribly excited as I thought it was implantation bleeding. But of course it was my AF turning up four days early. Boo. So here I am again, I think I've just ovulated so fingers crossed for a February baby for me

 

[Mrsmac02]

Does that happen often, could mean you have low progesterone kakae?

My scan pics are rubbish from 12 and 20 weeks I've got a 30w scan a week Thursday so I'll post that - hopefully be a lot better! X

Danser, the nausea and exhaustion suck but it always made me feel better as I took it as a good sign! So will you get plots of other scans/checks? I'm ok thanks, other than daily pelvic pain and being stressed beyond belief with work, selling our house, studying for my postgraduate. On the up side, we accepted an offer on our house and have had an offer accepted on one ourselves so we just need to sign the missives and sort out our mortgage! X

 

[Aayla]

I have an appt June 1. Doc wants to discuss next steps. his assistant didn't know which way he was leaning. so stuck in another limbo until next wednesday. ugh.

 

[Sweety21]

OMG! Danser, hearty Congratulations to you on twinnies. The ms sucks but, definitely a good sign that everything　is ok in there.

Kakae, so sorry af played trick on you. But, does it happens often? I was tricked by small bleeding once which was nothing.

I will post good scan pic 4d probably at 25weeks.My baby is really camera shy and don't have much to show in pics.

 

[kakae]

No it doesn't happen often, in fact this was the first time. It can range from 28-30 days, but this last cycle was only 24 days which was weird. But I have been all over the place with work and moving house and so on, fingers crossed it doesn't come at all next month!

 

[Mrsmac02]

Here's hoping!! X

 

[Sweety21]

fingers crossed.

 

[Aayla]

Started spotting today. I'm happy and not happy. Happy because I don't have to take provera to induce her. not happy because she is early. I emailed my doctor's assistant to ask him if I can do another round of letrozole to make sure I am resistant and it wasn't my cold that made me not ovulate. I was going to ask him at my appt as that was when af was due but by then it will be too late, even if I pushed it to cd 5 (which is the day before). Unfortunately I got an instant reply she is out of the office tomorrow (of course) so now I have to wait until first thing tomorrow to call and see if one of the other nurses will ask him for me. If no one can get a hold of him I may just do it on my own. I have 2 refills waiting for me a the pharmacy. All it will mean is that the doctor will have to wait until the next cycle to put the Mirena in if the letrozole doesn't work. If it does work then I don't have to consider next steps.

 

[Aayla]

So I ended up talking to my old nurse but she wasn't much help. Since af hadn't fully come she said to wait until monday when I can speak to my new nurse and she can talk to the doc directly and we don't have to try and wait for email responses through the weekend. Which made sense.

She said if she suddenly came and cd 3 happened before talking with the doc it wouldn't be a problem to shift it to cd 5-9 schedule. But light flow happened on Saturday and I am cd 2 today. Although it's weird. I had red yesterday but not a lot, but still needed a pad. Today it's pink when I wipe sometimes but most of what I am getting is brown, like "old" blood. Maybe it's because I didn't ovulate but the pills still did something.

So I am hopeful the doc will listen to me. I really do think I need one more cycle that has me healthy to confirm if I am suddenly resistant to it. Which I don't think I am because my period came relatively on time on her own, which doesn't happen when I don't ovulate.