August loss thread - TTC our rainbows!

[Aayla]

It isn't totally gone but doing better. I am at a 1 year old's bday party. That should say it all for my mood today.

 

[Mrsmac02]

Crikey, that can't be fun! Hope you get to relax later x

 

[Aayla]

I thought I would be ok but no, I am not. It is only another hour and then I can go home. Maybe sooner.

 

[Kandl123]

Hello everyone, I have 7 pages to catch up on.. So I will do tomorrow. It's getting late now, but just wanted to pop in and say that I hope everyone is okay. Been so busy and worked 24hrs this weekend so it's been a long one.

So yeah, hope you're all okay and I'll catch up with you tomorrow 😘

 

[bubbles82]

Sharing your pain Kandl, I've worked 33 hours over the last three days, so tired!

Hope AF comes for you soon Mrsmac, I've not had a visit from her yet but I'm only around 31 days since my mc started and my cycles are usually around 35 days so not expecting her yet, plus from charting I know she's still a week off for me.

I'm not surprised you find it hard to let your kids stay out Lora, I'm the same and only do it as we have no choice with our jobs, but I really hate it and wish I didn't have to have DD stay anywhere else. I can't imagine your situation with losing your babies in the way you have, but we had a scare when DD was 10 days old where she stopped breathing and we ended up being rushed back to hospital in an ambulance. I don't know if it's because of that or if I'd just be so protective of her anyway, but I hate the thought that no one else listens out for her in their sleep the same way I do, not even DH, it's a mummy thing.

As for my chart, I'm not sure what I think of it really as it seems to look pretty much the same either way on my BFP or AF cycles. I'm not feeling confident about our BD timing but I'd probably still feel that way if we'd BD every single day of my cycle!

I've got a confession to make actually, I ended up feeding my POAS habit today at 6dpo! I know this is ridiculous and too early to see a BFP, but I have such a big stash of ICs, I wasn't going to test so early but then thought it would be a good time to start to be able to compare later on, as it was likely to be a BFN today either way, and so I know any potential lines after this are new ones, as I was still getting quite dark lines before I gave up testing after my mc.

Hope everyone is ok xx

 

[LoraLoo]

Mrs Mac both times for me it was between 5 and 6 weeks.

I'm on cd 14/15 if I count the first day of bleeding as cd 1, but I'm not convinced it was Af- for one the bleeding lasted 11 days (usually 5) and secondly af wasn't due for another week. I was only 7/8 dpo when the bleeding started.

I've not got much cm, opks are negative. Been having few twinges on right side which I got about a week before ovulation last time. My bet (I'm hoping!) is that it'll be end of this week when I get a positive. Hopefully not any later!

Bubbles ive got a good feeling for you! I'm an early tester too and it's depressing seeing those bfns even when it's never going to be positive that early. I'm refusing to have any in te house this cycle!

 

[bubbles82]

I should probably have no access to tests too! But I've got about 50 ICs, 4 FRERs and one digi. I wouldn't use the more expensive ones until AF is late or I get a decent squinter, but don't see the harm in using a few ICs. (I sound like a proper addict in denial!) I'm ok with seeing BFNs at the moment, in fact I've quite liked seeing them to know the HCG is finally gone from last time.

I've tested today too at 7dpp, another stark BFN and started to think I was highly likely out for this cycle, but I popped into my journal to check when I got my squinters before, and last two times were both 10dpo with stark white BFNs before then. I thought that my 10dpo BFPs were from FRERs but I hadn't used them until 12dpo when AF was due. So I guess I've still got a few days to try be hopeful, and now the imaginary symptoms are kicking in! I'm actually scared to see anther BFP, I think that's why I don't mind the BFNs so much.

 

[LoraLoo]

The absolute earliest I've ever got a bfp is 9dpo. I'm the same I use the IC first, but I swear to god if you squint, hold them to the light, and balance on one leg- Theres ALWAYS a line 😂

What a miserable day it is out there today. How is everyone else? I who else is close to testing this month?

 

[bubbles82]

Haha I think I've done all that this morning and still BFN, tempted to draw a line on myself!

Weather is so miserable, I don't want to leave the house but got work at 4. My auntie said she was parking her car at mine to walk into town, thought she'd change her mind as it's pouring down but just seen her park up and set off in it, crazy!

 

[LoraLoo]

We were soaking shen we got home from the school run. I was going to go to Clarks to get alice some new shoes, but it can wait. She put her wellies on this morning lol.

Hopefully you will get 2 lovely pink lines in a couple of days! How great would that be? Fingers crossed x

 

[bubbles82]

Well this rainbow has to come some time! But I'm quite scared of seeing a BFP as I know all the worry will start again. Maybe I wasn't ready to try again so soon, but it's always going to be worrying so no point putting it off. Think I spoke about it in the post I lost, but would love to have a BFP this time to be able to announce at Christmas. That was our plan with my first loss which obviously didn't work out, but ended up with a Mother's Day announcement which was nice for our mums. This time my due date would be the date we got engaged 5 years earlier, and a Christmas announcement, so fingers crossed this is the one! I had planned a little craft project I saw to announce with last time, so might do that again and can wrap them for Christmas. Was heartbreaking having all the little parcels with the pieces I'd ordered for it arriving when I didn't need them anymore. I probably shouldn't think that far ahead just yet though.

 

[Kandl123]

The absolute earliest I've ever got a bfp is 9dpo. I'm the same I use the IC first, but I swear to god if you squint, hold them to the light, and balance on one leg- Theres ALWAYS a line 😂

What a miserable day it is out there today. How is everyone else? I who else is close to testing this month?

I'll be due to test on the 24th, that's if af doesn't arrive on that day. This is the week for me where I need to be doing lots of bd 😏. What day are you due to test? Sorry if I've missed it if you've already said, I've just so much so catch up on from last couple of days x

 

[Kandl123]

This might sound like such a stupid question, but I have a smear booked for Thursday.. Thursday/Friday/Saturday will be my best days to be bd for a chance of conceiving according to the app on my phone anyway. Is there any chance a smear can affect it in any way? I'm worried it will

 

[LoraLoo]

You're right it has to happen sometime and this months as good as any 😀

For me I have november in my head but just a gut feeling. I'd like to be pregnsn before Xmas but keep telling myself that the likehood is i will be pregnant within the next 6 months.
As for announcing, no idea what I will do next time.

 

[LoraLoo]

The absolute earliest I've ever got a bfp is 9dpo. I'm the same I use the IC first, but I swear to god if you squint, hold them to the light, and balance on one leg- Theres ALWAYS a line 😂

What a miserable day it is out there today. How is everyone else? I who else is close to testing this month?

I'll be due to test on the 24th, that's if af doesn't arrive on that day. This is the week for me where I need to be doing lots of bd 😏. What day are you due to test? Sorry if I've missed it if you've already said, I've just so much so catch up on from last couple of days x

I'm still waiting for positive Opk to possibly around same time as you x

 

[Justme43]

You're right it has to happen sometime and this months as good as any 😀

For me I have november in my head but just a gut feeling. I'd like to be pregnsn before Xmas but keep telling myself that the likehood is i will be pregnant within the next 6 months.
As for announcing, no idea what I will do next time.

Good Morning Ladies -

Loo - It looks like November may be a more realistic month for me. AF is virtually gone now as I am only spotting (barely). This means that I'll be ovulating next week which puts me in the mid October. Let's see what happens. This will be the first time officially trying after the m/c and I am both excited and a little nervous.

How is everyone else doing?

 

[LoraLoo]

November sound be a lovely early Xmas present wouldnt it?

Kandl I don't think the smear would have any negative affect x

 

[Justme43]

This might sound like such a stupid question, but I have a smear booked for Thursday.. Thursday/Friday/Saturday will be my best days to be bd for a chance of conceiving according to the app on my phone anyway. Is there any chance a smear can affect it in any way? I'm worried it will

Hi Kandi - it's not a stupid question. I do not think it would affect anything at all. The only thing would be if you feel too uncomfortable after the exam to dtd which you shouldn't - so I think you will be okay.

If you still feel uncomfortable by the time of you appointment, tell you Dr you plans and what your concerns.

 

[Justme43]

Well this rainbow has to come some time! But I'm quite scared of seeing a BFP as I know all the worry will start again. Maybe I wasn't ready to try again so soon, but it's always going to be worrying so no point putting it off. Think I spoke about it in the post I lost, but would love to have a BFP this time to be able to announce at Christmas. That was our plan with my first loss which obviously didn't work out, but ended up with a Mother's Day announcement which was nice for our mums. This time my due date would be the date we got engaged 5 years earlier, and a Christmas announcement, so fingers crossed this is the one! I had planned a little craft project I saw to announce with last time, so might do that again and can wrap them for Christmas. Was heartbreaking having all the little parcels with the pieces I'd ordered for it arriving when I didn't need them anymore. I probably shouldn't think that far ahead just yet though.

Hey bubbles - your anxiety is completely understandable but like you said, you may feel like that no matter how long you wait because it will be the first after the loss.

My first AF is about gone which means I'll be trying and I am a little nervous too. It is hard not to feel that way, but it can't stop us.

I hope you get your Christmas present..

 

[bubbles82]

Thanks Justme, fingers crossed your rainbow is on the way very soon too.

I just got into work to find a 'congratulations on your pregnancy' email from HR, and maternity pack. I couldn't believe it, someone saw my sicknote which was down as 'pregnancy related' so it didn't affect my sickness record, and decided to assume I forgot to inform them officially of a pregnancy and just had a bit of time off, so they recorded it for me, meaning I get all the emails. Not really what someone who's just experienced a loss wants to see. My sicknote even stated 'recent miscarriage' as I didn't get to actually speak to the doctor to request anything different be put on it. Made me feel very fed up, and stuck here until midnight.