Clothes as presents - is it just me?

[Logan's Mum]

I think it's wrong giving clothes as presents for small children. Not very exciting for them to open. They are basically essentials and I think it's a bit cheap tbh,like wrapping a loaf of bread and giving it as a gift. It's different once they are teenagers I think,and they want specific expensive designer stuff.

Yes!! I think some people just do it to make their stashes look bigger. I understand if you are short on money and need something to wrap up, and yes a child should be grateful whatever they get. But not to just make you look good! X

 

[leoniebabey]

another reason i don't buy clothes for xmas is i find they don't get much wear as i'd of already bought the kids winter sizes september/october time. if people ask i normally say just to get vouchers that i can use once the spring stuff starts coming in rather than them buy jumpers etc. which get wasted.

 

[toptrump]

Gabriella only gets knickers and socks she really would not appreciate plus I see them as an everyday essential. Plus she may be only 4 but she is so strong willed she knows what she likes and if she does not like she will not wear

I always feel bad as family always buy her clothes for birthday and Christmas and they always pick what they like rather than what gabby likes and although I appreciate, as I say if she does not like she will not wear.

 

[Kate&Lucas]

I will absolutely be giving DS2 clothes for Christmas, he will be 1 and has everything he needs and could want (especially being the second) I'm not filling our house with plastic because it's "cheap" to buy essentials, he just needs to be seen to unwrap something or his big brother will get upset when DS1 was very young DH and I were very strapped for cash, we asked people to give clothes if they asked because it helped and all he needed was something to unwrap (our families spoil him so he got a ton of toys too!) and even though now DH and and I are a world away from the financial difficulties we had those years ago I will not waste money for the sake of it, if a child doesn't appreciate a present because it is an item of clothing I would seriously be questioning how you are bringing up that child tbh.

That's a bit much. I'd expect a four year old to be as appreciative of a pack of t shirts for Christmas as I would be if someone handed me a bit of old rope wrapped up in pretty paper. He'd say thank you to be polite but he'd be pretty obviously disappointed, and as a small child with no filter he'd let you know. If not wanting to disappoint my son on Christmas Day makes people question my parenting then yikes!

 

[sbl]

I know that if I showed disappointment or ingratitude for gift my parents would have told me off for it.
I was always taught to be grateful even if what I got wasn't what I wanted and I'll teach my daughter the same.

I wish someone would buy me nice clothes (wrapped or not I'm not fussy) and give them to me though.
Sigh.....being an adult is hard.

 

[emyandpotato]

I don't gift clothes no. And think using them as a 'bulking' agent for the pile of gifts is really strange. I don't think kids needs a massive mountain of gifts, personally, it's about content, not volume. Certainly in my house.

I agree about the bulking. I totally get that a large pile of presents can look magical but I think it sort of sets up materialistic expectations about Christmas, and personally that is not something I want to do.

 

[Pearls18]

I will absolutely be giving DS2 clothes for Christmas, he will be 1 and has everything he needs and could want (especially being the second) I'm not filling our house with plastic because it's "cheap" to buy essentials, he just needs to be seen to unwrap something or his big brother will get upset when DS1 was very young DH and I were very strapped for cash, we asked people to give clothes if they asked because it helped and all he needed was something to unwrap (our families spoil him so he got a ton of toys too!) and even though now DH and and I are a world away from the financial difficulties we had those years ago I will not waste money for the sake of it, if a child doesn't appreciate a present because it is an item of clothing I would seriously be questioning how you are bringing up that child tbh.

That's a bit much. I'd expect a four year old to be as appreciative of a pack of t shirts for Christmas as I would be if someone handed me a bit of old rope wrapped up in pretty paper. He'd say thank you to be polite but he'd be pretty obviously disappointed, and as a small child with no filter he'd let you know. If not wanting to disappoint my son on Christmas Day makes people question my parenting then yikes!

I can only go from my own experiences, my son was 3 last year and I decided to video him opening his present when I pressed record I laughed and said to hubby "oh I had to pick the pants to record didn't I?" But what did he do? Enthusiastically opened them and shouted "WOW PANTS!!" It's one of my favourite videos. Of course he will be more excited for some presents than others, but never, ever has he opened a present and looked disappointed, he might want to move on to the next one quicker if it's less exciting lol but he has always been fully capable of showing appreciation. If I felt like I had to only give him the cream of the crop in exciting presents because of his disappointment, yes I would question what I am actually teaching him. At 4 my son is fully capable of emotionally understanding someone has made the effort to give him something and be grateful for that.

 

[monkee12]

I agree with the above in some ways, I don't agree with it being how children are raised as most kids are disappointed by clothes but are still grateful. Xmas is about being a magical day with your family, not presents

 

[Pearls18]

The way you raise a child can help them rationalise the situation, I believe.

 

[Wriggley]

I don't buy clothes as presents because I see them as essentials.

I knew of a woman who every year told her daughter she had to buy her school uniform with her birthday money :/ I'm sorry but that is just plain wrong.

My son knows to be polite and say thank you and he is never disappointed when others have gotten him clothes but that's just the way he is I'm not going to take credit for that :/

 

[monkee12]

I wouldn't say my kids are disappointed with clothes, but I know they wouldn't be as thrilled. They are very respectful and do get clothes (from family members) but I just wouldn't get them clothes myself except an Xmas day outfit and Xmas eve pj's x

 

[Leliana]

I'll buy LO a Christmas Outfit and new PJs but that's it. I love baby clothes and buy lots during the year so don't bother buying them as a gift.

However, on the flip side, I LOVE it when someone else buys LO clothes - it's almost like another gift for me

 

[Elphaba12]

I'll buy LO a Christmas Outfit and new PJs but that's it. I love baby clothes and buy lots during the year so don't bother buying them as a gift.

However, on the flip side, I LOVE it when someone else buys LO clothes - it's almost like another gift for me

Hehe I feel like this too

 

[Pearls18]

I don't buy clothes as presents because I see them as essentials.

I knew of a woman who every year told her daughter she had to buy her school uniform with her birthday money :/ I'm sorry but that is just plain wrong.

My son knows to be polite and say thank you and he is never disappointed when others have gotten him clothes but that's just the way he is I'm not going to take credit for that :/

I take the credit for ALL the good things and blame DH for all the bad stuff

 

[Wriggley]

I don't buy clothes as presents because I see them as essentials.

I knew of a woman who every year told her daughter she had to buy her school uniform with her birthday money :/ I'm sorry but that is just plain wrong.

My son knows to be polite and say thank you and he is never disappointed when others have gotten him clothes but that's just the way he is I'm not going to take credit for that :/

I take the credit for ALL the good things and blame DH for all the bad stuff

I used to do this but then my youngest came along and we have done everything the same with him and he is completely different to my oldest so now I do put things down to their personality.

Obviously my youngest is too young to be disappointed with presents (he's happy playing with a mug tree and curtain rings) but like my oldest has never had a full on tantrum but my youngest has plenty lol so I've come away of the believe that we shape every aspect of our LOs obviously yes we do shape them a lot but not in the way I used to think

 

[Pearls18]

Oh I totally agree and definitely something I'm learning with DS2 (especially in terms of routine and sleep, I'm not the sleep hero I thought I was!), but I really do think something like gratitude, manners and perspective is something we majorly instil in our children.

 

[Kate&Lucas]

I will absolutely be giving DS2 clothes for Christmas, he will be 1 and has everything he needs and could want (especially being the second) I'm not filling our house with plastic because it's "cheap" to buy essentials, he just needs to be seen to unwrap something or his big brother will get upset when DS1 was very young DH and I were very strapped for cash, we asked people to give clothes if they asked because it helped and all he needed was something to unwrap (our families spoil him so he got a ton of toys too!) and even though now DH and and I are a world away from the financial difficulties we had those years ago I will not waste money for the sake of it, if a child doesn't appreciate a present because it is an item of clothing I would seriously be questioning how you are bringing up that child tbh.

That's a bit much. I'd expect a four year old to be as appreciative of a pack of t shirts for Christmas as I would be if someone handed me a bit of old rope wrapped up in pretty paper. He'd say thank you to be polite but he'd be pretty obviously disappointed, and as a small child with no filter he'd let you know. If not wanting to disappoint my son on Christmas Day makes people question my parenting then yikes!

I can only go from my own experiences, my son was 3 last year and I decided to video him opening his present when I pressed record I laughed and said to hubby "oh I had to pick the pants to record didn't I?" But what did he do? Enthusiastically opened them and shouted "WOW PANTS!!" It's one of my favourite videos. Of course he will be more excited for some presents than others, but never, ever has he opened a present and looked disappointed, he might want to move on to the next one quicker if it's less exciting lol but he has always been fully capable of showing appreciation. If I felt like I had to only give him the cream of the crop in exciting presents because of his disappointment, yes I would question what I am actually teaching him. At 4 my son is fully capable of emotionally understanding someone has made the effort to give him something and be grateful for that.

I wouldn't necessarily only give him "cream of the crop" gifts but I just don't see the point in giving him something I know he doesn't want. He doesn't want clothes the same as he doesn't want me to wrap up his dinner, it's just an essential to him. I expect him to a grateful for things he gets (especially when it comes to gifts from others), but I don't expect him to pretend to be excited about something a bit crap.

Leliana I'm the same, I go through them like "yay!"

 

[Pearls18]

I will absolutely be giving DS2 clothes for Christmas, he will be 1 and has everything he needs and could want (especially being the second) I'm not filling our house with plastic because it's "cheap" to buy essentials, he just needs to be seen to unwrap something or his big brother will get upset when DS1 was very young DH and I were very strapped for cash, we asked people to give clothes if they asked because it helped and all he needed was something to unwrap (our families spoil him so he got a ton of toys too!) and even though now DH and and I are a world away from the financial difficulties we had those years ago I will not waste money for the sake of it, if a child doesn't appreciate a present because it is an item of clothing I would seriously be questioning how you are bringing up that child tbh.

That's a bit much. I'd expect a four year old to be as appreciative of a pack of t shirts for Christmas as I would be if someone handed me a bit of old rope wrapped up in pretty paper. He'd say thank you to be polite but he'd be pretty obviously disappointed, and as a small child with no filter he'd let you know. If not wanting to disappoint my son on Christmas Day makes people question my parenting then yikes!

I can only go from my own experiences, my son was 3 last year and I decided to video him opening his present when I pressed record I laughed and said to hubby "oh I had to pick the pants to record didn't I?" But what did he do? Enthusiastically opened them and shouted "WOW PANTS!!" It's one of my favourite videos. Of course he will be more excited for some presents than others, but never, ever has he opened a present and looked disappointed, he might want to move on to the next one quicker if it's less exciting lol but he has always been fully capable of showing appreciation. If I felt like I had to only give him the cream of the crop in exciting presents because of his disappointment, yes I would question what I am actually teaching him. At 4 my son is fully capable of emotionally understanding someone has made the effort to give him something and be grateful for that.

I wouldn't necessarily only give him "cream of the crop" gifts but I just don't see the point in giving him something I know he doesn't want. He doesn't want clothes the same as he doesn't want me to wrap up his dinner, it's just an essential to him. I expect him to a grateful for things he gets (especially when it comes to gifts from others), but I don't expect him to pretend to be excited about something a bit crap.

Leliana I'm the same, I go through them like "yay!"

I get what you mean but clothes aren't "a bit of crap" it's quite common for them to be gifted, just like food is even though food can be seen as a necessity.

 

[motherofboys]

Darn I wrote a big reply and my internet went off when I pressed send and so it didn't post. Ok I think I remember most of what I wrote lol

Those saying about good bits coming from you and bad bits from DH. My ds3 is DH all over again. He can look at a picture of his daddy as a child and say "thats me, but I don't remember that house". And personality he is him to a tee. Even down to the fact the boy can not keep still and DH couldn't at that age. The others I could take anywhere, DS3 wanted to do hand stands on chairs at his great grandmas wake the other month! So when DH moans about something ds3 does I point all the blame at him and say "he is 100% you, there are none of my genes in there" but I fail to mention that DS1s mouth and back chat come from me LMAO

Sizes of clothes wise I can get away with it. I buy character tees mainly IF I buy clothes, so they can be worn all year. And DS2 and 4 have just gone up a size around their birthdays in october and DS1 and 3 I buy the next size up as their birthdays are feb and march.
MIL can't think ahead so buys whatever size they are when she buys it, so often she'll give them clothes that are too small. Especially DS1 who has been in bigger size clothes for practically his whole life as he is very tall. She knows this, yet wont buy bigger clothes. So as he was 8 in feb she'll buy him 8-9, although at Christmas when she gives it to him he'll be almost 9 and needing 10-11 years clothes.
I do have wrapping obsession so anything I'm going to give them around Christmas time can and will be wrapped. I do love to see big piles of presents, but I wouldn't say I wrap things in order to bulk the piles up. Especially as its only 1 or 2 extra gifts which wrap up quite small anyway. But I really try to make sure that they know the presents are not that important. Sure they are exciting and who doesn't like being given stuff? But if I ask my boys their favourite part of Christmas I get a mixture of the music, the food and watching christmas films with blankets and hot chocolate. If I ask what Christmas is about they say having fun with your family. And also Baby Jesus being born. I think as long as they value the time we spend together more than the presents it doesn't matter how many presents and how big their pile is. And soon they will understand how much money I actually have to lay out at Christmas and realise how lucky they are to have had that spent on them any and that if they want certain things they have to expect a smaller pile.

Mine do get excited about the clothes they get, maybe not as much as a toy, but they do go "wow an angry birds t-shirt!" and sometimes want to put it straight on. I don't expect them to be as thrilled, and I think if I gave (an older child) lots of clothes, they might feel a bit "oh, more clothes" but for a little one, especially that won't remember, I don't see the harm.

 

[highhopes19]

I don't tend to buy clothes at Xmas or birthdays... I imagine for a kid to open and see them would be boring lol... I could be wrong.

I think a character top or pjs is fine but a full on wardrobe I personally wouldn't.

If Isabelle gets christmas money I do usually take it to the next sale on Boxing Day, which all my family are aware of and think its a good idea xx