Rainbow Makers - WTTAL, NTNPAL, TTCAL & PAL friends

[hannpin]

Hey girlies, hope all have had a good day.

Identity theft... what a nighmare Tash, hope they can sort things for you soon.

MM I will be thinking of Charlie and you sunday, We are away this wkend camping at the sea, but would love to do something for him, let me know if you girlies have any good ideas (thats if you don't mind hun xx)

Sass any sign of a BFP today?

AFM I am symtom spotting like crazy prommised myself I wouldn't... but I poas yesterday of course as I was at most 4dpo

 

[SassyLou]

BFN today but still no AF!

 

[SassyLou]

Tasha Glad you enjoyed Glee, no bullying from me
I wish I was fat and fed up too I'd have been 38+1 today
Well done with the driving, I hear you're a natural?
Can't believe the identity theft!!

Mummymarsh How are you?

Hannpin You've got the POAS bug too fingers crossed for you.

Jo How are you?

Hope SJ and her DH are having a good time in Greece.

AFM Not really said much on here, but ever since all the trouble with the hospital (the hospital loosing Archie etc) I've either not been sleeping or when I do I have nightmares. Well yesterday had a melt down. Rob is doing full time union work rather than nursing at the moment and keeps going to work in the office during the day (keep in mind the office is literally round the corner from our house. He usually works nights), when he went yesterday I didn't want to be in the house on my own, I cried for about 3 hours solid. I think Rob has realised for a while that I'm not in a good place so insisted I went to the doctors, which I did today. The other thing is it was only early last year that I was having counselling with the practice counsellor, my ex (eldest sons dad) was abusive (physically, mentally and sexually), I think I must have blocked it, well it all came back a few years ago due to other family issues, so I had counselling. No sooner finished that when I found out I was pregnant with the baby we lost at 8 weeks and then quickly got pregnant again with Archie so its been a nightmare really.

Anyway (sorry its long) the doctor doesn't want to give me medication as we're TTC but has referred me for counselling with the mental health team rather than practice counsellor. Laughable really when you think I used to be a psychiatric nurse in a mental health day unit!

Now you know all my dark and dusty secrets

xxx

 

[hannpin]

Ohh sass so sorry u are having souch a rough time but i am so glad u have been strong enough to go to your gp and seek advice. i really hope the councelling help you.

do u think your training in mental health effect how u see things. i know it is not th same but i am a careers advisor, so am trained in helpin people analise their thinkin and decision making skills etc, and i think because of this i over think how i am thinking, the reasons behind my thinking and try to perhaps tell myself how i should think... rather than just getting on with thigs iyknim.

gosh you have been through alot, no one should have to endure what you have to.

if u ever need to talk u know where i am, and all of us in here i am sure would be happy to help in any way we can xxx

 

[SassyLou]

Ohh sass so sorry u are having souch a rough time but i am so glad u have been strong enough to go to your gp and seek advice. i really hope the councelling help you.

do u think your training in mental health effect how u see things. i know it is not th same but i am a careers advisor, so am trained in helpin people analise their thinkin and decision making skills etc, and i think because of this i over think how i am thinking, the reasons behind my thinking and try to perhaps tell myself how i should think... rather than just getting on with thigs iyknim.

gosh you have been through alot, no one should have to endure what you have to.

if u ever need to talk u know where i am, and all of us in here i am sure would be happy to help in any way we can xxx

Thank you you're so kind

I probably do over analyse things, although I haven't worked in mental health for a long time now. I qualified (trained at Sheffield uni) and realised I'm made a mistake Worked in nursing for a few years then had Harry. Didn't particularly want to go back. In the meantime someone asked me to teach their child piano, I reluctantly agreed and loved it. From there I started teaching more kids piano, went on teaching courses. Since then I've managed a music school, set up a correspondance course for music theory. Taught piano, flute and clarinet privately as well as working in a primary school in Sheffield 3/4 days a week. When we moved here from Sheffield we moved because of Rob's job so we made a deal that if I moved for him I didn't have to work, but I quickly got bored! So I work as a freelance musician/music teacher, haven't got much work on at the minute but TBH thats more intentional than anything.

As for my ex I was with him from 15 to almost 18, I really thought I'd left it all behind me, but it really did come back to haunt me. Mainly because of some hastle my sisters caused me!

Thanks so much for replying, I did think when I wrote it, god I sound like a complete lunatic

Have to say the only good thing that came out of nursing was Rob, he was a staff nurse and I was a student on his ward

xxx

 

[SassyLou]

Just quick update have some work this morning, AF got me!

Love to everyone xxxxx

 

[mummymarsh]

morning everyone,

Thank you for the ideas and thoughts about Charlie for this Sunday i would love it so much... im taking a balloon and a candle over to the cemetery myself to light.... i would also like to do the same for your babies.... not just due dates but birthdays too... Hannah maybe you could add to the begining the stats of our angel babies so we can always refer to it???

Charlie Steven Marsh born sleeping at 24+3 weeks on 16th March 2011- Due 3rd July 2011

sassy - sorry your having a shit time at moment and that AF got you this morning you really have had it rough although get what you mean about you used to work on the mental health unit my mum was training to be mental health nurse and she has been mentally unwell for a long time, she has spent lots of time volutary in a mental health ward due to various reasons, and has "attempted" suicide on may occassions, which was crappy on us kids..... my uncle (mums brother) is a drug induced schitsophrenic (sp) and has been sectioned (involuntary) twice.... we have lots of expereince with mental health in our family lol...

i hope you can work through everything, and we are hear if you just need to blurt things out

Tasha - are police looking into it for you???? not good...

Jo - how are the nights going???

not heard from melly for a while????

AFM CD5 and i think AF is on its way home thank god......

 

[Mellybelle]

I;m still here girls....trying to have a bit of a catch up.

The walk on sunday was really nice. BUT I FORGOT THE CARD! I feel awful ladies, but I had all of our angels in my thoughts. I promise to do something nice for them and post a pic here.
The bridge walk had been organised by Illawarra Parents Of Baby Angels. A local support group. I had never heard of them and I am so pissed off with the hospital for not telling me about them. I really could have used a local support group. Rod and I will be attending the next time they meet.
It was beautiful and the flower laying ceremony was quite emotional. And although it was sad to see so many other parents that have lost their babies it was really special to feel not so alone.
I will post pics soon, just have to get the energy to find the camera.
Will catch up on missed pages now....

 

[Mellybelle]

Sassy.... You really have had a rough time

 

[mummymarsh]

hi melly and hahahaha for forgetting the card, thats something i would do lol..... glad the walk went well.....

hows the pregnancy going????

xxx

 

[Mellybelle]

OK, i guess. Still really scary. I keep dreaming of blood in my knickers. Needless to say I am on constant knicker-watch. I try my hardest to stay positive, but it always feels so unlikely that I'll end up with another baby. This is my 7th pregnancy and I only have two children. Have started buying something each week. Baby celebration gifts. At week 6 I bought a reuseable nappy (just the one) from ebay. At week 7 it was Rods turn, and he picked some little white mittens at Kmart. This is my way of trying to bond with baby I guess, and trying to make it feel a little bit more real. I've been trying to think of a nickname too. We've never had a nickname for our babies before. What do you think of "Midge"?

 

[Mellybelle]

And I wanted to add that I'd like to see every stick that gets peed on posted here. I love looking at pee sticks. Even opks.

 

[mummymarsh]

peed on sticks hahahahahaha..... mine will defo be up...

im kinda considering doing OPKs secretly (from the husband) how accurate are they....

i hope to be positive next pregnancy too, but im already fretting over it..... i like that idea if buying something little each week though... with lilly we didnt buy till 20 week scan when we new the sex and we were gonna do the same with charlie but our 19 week scan was where problems were detected so we decided to wait and see what happened..... and the rest is history... poor Charlie didnt get anything until he died and then we bought him a lovely blue blanket and a little monkey.....

xxx

 

[hannpin]

just poppin in on a scive from work Great idea MM about putting our angels info on 1st post too, is everyone happy with me doing this???

Will catch up on things propperly later, and update 1st post if appropriate

Melly loving the idea of buying a little thing each week

Catch u all laters... oh and you really dont want to see my 4dpo bfn... haha

 

[Jox]

Hi all :wave:

Sassy - im sorry AF got you and sorry your having such a shit time atm. Can arrange to meet for dinner soon if you want to?

MM - I would also like to light a candle for Charlie on sunday

If you do decide to update the front page with our Angels details then Kaspers are Kasper born sleeping at 36+2 weeks on 2nd January 2010 - due date was 28th January 2010

Hannah - how are you? im hoping your bfp will be here very soon!!

Melly - its all so scary. knicker checking is completely normal but so horrible

SJ - hope your having a nice holiday!!

Tasha - thats rubbish for the identity theft hope your driving lessons are going well!! how are you feeling?

AFM - Been getting the belly aches again within an hour or so of taking the tablets. ive only taken about 7 all together and suppose to take 3 a day chris was at the docs this morning for a normal check up and told the doc i was still getting belly aches so shes given him a prescription for me. told me to stop taking the other tabs and to start taking these ones so will start them this afternoon. I just want AF to stop but want to belly aches to go too

Spoke to chris a few days ago about having implant out and weve agreed next month (as in July)

Hope everyone is ok

xxx

 

[mummymarsh]

whooo jo only 1 more day then hahahahahahahah yippeee... i love how doc perscribes you things in his appointment lmao... awesome....... thank you for the candle thought xxxx

 

[Jox]

Our doc is amazing so much easier than me having to book another appointment lol

Think im gonna wait till mid july then book an appointment to have it took out!! im a little scared i think

hope AFs been gentle on you and is on her way out now!!

xxx

 

[mummymarsh]

yes it has been a gentle one although i got hit hard with PMT.... i was a crazy bitch 5 days ago lol.....

scared about thought of becoming an NTNPer or scared incase it hurts when it comes out???

 

[Jox]

scared about being a NTNPer!! i want another earth baby to complete our family and feel ready for another baby but i know in all honestly im petrified of being pregnant and not sure im ready to cope with it again but then i know I will always feel like this. i dont think i will ever feel ready iykwim? plus i really dont want much more then a 2 year age gap so know I just need to get the pregnancy out of the way because you cant change the age gap in the future if that makes sense?? so no point waiting till i feel more 'ready' iykwim? :crazy:

Glad AF was a gentle one but Boo for PMT. i dont really suffer with it too bad... bloody good job after 5 weeks of af!! OH would be completely grey!!

xxx

 

[Tasha]

Evening girls.

NaughtySarah, massive for all that you have been through, how low you are and for AF getting you.

Kayleigh, glad you like the idea. I will deffo do that then.

Jo, OMG!!!!!!!!!!!! Yay, cant wait for you to be a NTNPer! So exciting. How is work?

Melly, that is a nice idea about buying things. Honestly dont think I will be able to now, I had only bought a couple of blankets for Riley Rae. I dont think the knicker checking ever stops.

Hannah, love the sneaking onto here at work I like the idea of our angels being on the front page too. If you do then Honey was born sleeping on the 16th May 2007 at 36+6, her due date was the 7th June 2007 and Riley Rae was born on the 15th May 2011 and her due date is 2nd August 2011.

Me nothing much to say, I feel so sick though