The Gassy Girls!.....43 BFP's and counting!

[dinidani]

there is no point i have been on it i have had a previuse one but i didnt have to go throught the labour with the other one but i dont see the different with the pic i stuck on then the ones of dead baby as every one say as soon as there is a heart beat it is a living thing xx

 

[heavyheart]

dinidani - so sorry for your loss, i know the hurt and emptiness you are feeling right now, many women on here do. I do know exactly how your feeling i have has 2 losses that i gave birth to one at 19+weeks and the other in july at 13weeks so i do understand your pain. Its not that people dont care about your loss its just that it can be distressing for other women who have suffered losses to come face with the image that sadly alot of us have seen, also distressing for the ladies who havent suffered losses. I know its so hard and you just wanted everyone else to understand your loss and pain and we really do

I wish you all the best and sending tons of hugs your way xx

 

[dinidani]

but to be honest yh you are all pregnant or have a child for some one like me how only have hadmisscarage after misscarage without any baby or child none of yous can now how i feel as deep down all of yous would say im glad that wasnt me and if any of yous will disagreee stop me then as tobe completly honest if ANY AND I MEAN ANY of my sister was having a baby i only wished that their babys was completly helthly as i would not want them to go through what i have and i would lose any thing to see the look on any of my sisters face when they come home with their babys xx

 

[CelticStar]

You might feel as if you're the only woman to have gone through what you're going through Dani but you're not. Not everyone is pregnant or has had a child, I myself am pregnant right now but have also got three angel babies and no living ones.
I had to give birth to a second tri angel and what I pushed out was easily recognisable as a foetus. I know I'm not the only one to have experienced this. Even now I'm terrified that I may lose this baby because from past experience, second tri is not a safe place for me, I'm counting down the days until I get to 24 weeks and my baby is viable if anything should go wrong (God forbid).

I think maybe you should be posting in the miscarriage support forum if that is how you really feel.

While this thread is about supporting each other through whatever we all go through, be it loss, pregnancy or ttc, posts that declare none of us know what you're going through when you don't know our different histories can be very hurtful.

Please don't think I'm having a go at you or not understanding your pain, believe me, I know the pain all too well, I just think that you need to realise you're not alone in this and that you could get the support you need from the appropriate forum.

 

[dinidani]

i know im not alone but as ever one says about pregnancy every body is different and yh i think about that with every one and i hd been in and out every week for the past 10-11 weeks everyone was like the baby is ok bla bla until i go for my scan for them to say my babys dead yh very good how to explain that to everyone how has supported you yh im 18 in college and working to help pay for stuff for the bubba i live with my OH but hay you lot are either aolder then me right xx

 

[CelticStar]

I don't think age has anything to do with it, but my personal past is angel at 16, angel at 21 and angel at 24.

The loss I had at 24 was traumatic enough to put me off getting pregnant again until now, 29.

I know it's hard because you're in pain right now but please think about the other ladies on this thread when posting Dani, there are a lot of emotions involved in ttc alone, that's without taking into consideration other emotional events.

We will all be here for you if you want our support but don't lash out at us just because we're lucky enough to either be pregnant or already have children, if you don't feel like you can do this then maybe you should take a step back from this thread until you feel able to think of other feelings and emotions.

 

[dinidani]

what so im suppose to stop rantang about ttc hay i thought this is what this was for at the end of the day yes age does not matter but 2 misscarages in 2 years and that aint looking good for me is it cos every thing is running around my hed right now because i heard have a second miscarrage at my age is extremely rare let anone at any age so yous with 2 angels baby without kids or pregnant may feel asif they canot get pregnant espcial as i have never ever done anything rong in my life nd i have seeen families fall appart over things like this xx

 

[CelticStar]

I'm asking you to consider other people on this thread, like I said, maybe you should put a thread up in the miscarriage support forum.

 

[dinidani]

why that whont help bring my baby back will it xx

 

[Coleey]

I'm so so sorry Dinidani My heart goes out to you xx

 

[frisbeemama12]

Dini I know you are hurt and you are angry that you cant have your child.. But do consider that some women on this thread know what youre going through.. I was 18 when I got pregnant the first time. I was fortunate enough to have a healthy baby girl.
HOWEVER in 2011 I had 2 miscarriages within 7 months of each other.. the first one being a case JUST LIKE yours.. I KNEW I was 10 to 13 weeks and yet I went in for a scan and the baby measured about 6 weeks.. it was heartbreaking but I still had more to come, I had to wait almost two weeks before I had any cramping or bleeding and felt EXACTLY how you are feeling. I know what its like to push your child out but not get to hold or get to know him/her.. as to MANY women on this thread. I know youre hurt and upset and angry but please be considerate enough to us who know EXACTLY what youre going through...
Im so very sorry that you have to go through this..

 

[Mas1118]

Dinidani-I'm so very sorry for your loss. You are in my thoughts and I am praying that you get to hold your very own healthy new born child in the near future. If you need to talk and vent, we're here to listen.

 

[dinidani]

frisbee esactly you have a child and thanks mas and frisbee iim not angry or hurt i have to considder that othrers have gone throught it ok maybe aas some people cant have children or stuff but when your 18 nd i have had 1 chemical and one missed i dont actualy think that you are aware of what im going through as you had a child so you know that you can have children so were is the simuilarity and celtic right i ctualy am sorry but i cant take the fact that one you thinhk you know how i feel if youl dont asactly know what i have been through in my past 2 you re pregnant 3 your baby is still in there and it is still alive xx

 

[CelticStar]

I'm not going to spill my history on here as it's something that I don't like to talk about and I don't see why I should have to justify the fact that I'm pregnant now.

You've been pregnant twice and lost both babies, for that I really am sorry but here's the kicker, before this pregnancy I had been pregnant three times and lost all three babies.

You're 18 years old, you have plenty of years left where you could carry to full term, if I remember correctly, wasn't this pregnancy very soon after your mmc?
Obviously you can get pregnant, maybe you should be consulting your doctor about why you have had the two mc's.
It seems you're very angry (whether you know it or not) and I really think that some sort of counselling may be beneficial to you.

I'm just going to say this straight and it may sound harsh but it's not how I mean it.

With you telling people that there's no way they can understand your pain because they already have children or are pregnant, you're actually belittling the pain that they have been through themselves and yes I'm including myself in that.
There's at least two ladies on this thread that I could say understand your pain completely, not including myself.
If you're not able to think of their feelings when you're posting then I'm asking you to not post on here until you feel more able to.

There's one lady who has just gone public with her bfp after a mc and yet she's disappeared from everyones radar and has had NO congratulations because of your ranting about how no one understands your pain. How do you think she feels?

This is a TWW thread and a TTC buddy thread (not how I intended it when I first started it but I'm not complaining about it) if you want some support from the ladies on here to help you through this time then obviously that is there for you BUT please don't forget that these ladies are also here for support.

I'm now going to step away from this thread for a while because I'm actually very angry that my three angels apparently don't mean anything and that even though I've had three losses, I apparently don't understand about pain.

 

[dinidani]

no i never said you dont feel the loss and not angry and why would counciling be help full hmm i would not understand why as i hve in college done sociology phycolgy and am currently study child care so i dont think that i actualy need a counciling of any sort as i have seen what child lose has brought on many people but if i do then there is no need for any body ecsept all off my family to deside on any change in my behaver and yp ttc thats what ill should be doing when i stop bleeding as the % of getting another bfp is a[ lot highter yet there is then the % after the 2 mc its now a lot highter of me now getting not getting pregnant again and yet getting pregnant is easy while im young as were madly in love as some would say in the honey moon section but its getting through the pregnancy i have already said to my partner i dont care the sex i dont care about if my baby has a disabilty as long as it does not suffer anything in the womb or when it comes out xxx

 

[Mas1118]

Hi Dinidani, everyone is different on how they react to events throughout their lives - no one probably ever knows exactly how one feels but being women - and yes some of us are Mothers - we can relate to many different things and feel sympathy and offer support and comfort even if we haven't had the same experience. Please don't attack us and try to make us feel bad as it is just going to end up alienating those that are here to offer understanding.

 

[dinidani]

no im not haveing ago at any of you if it seems that i amm then im sorry i was just gettin that point accrossed that us women dont feel the same and no one know s esactly what is going on in my head xx

 

[Bean66]

Dani - again I'm very sorry for your loss. I had a chemical lady cycle but in no way know the pain that you ladies who've had a miscarriage have suffered. I know statistics don't help the pain in anyway and I do not mean to belittle the pain by mentioning them but I think they might have some relevance here.

Dani - I am sorry you have suffered two losses at such a young age. A chemical pregnancy although painful (I had one last cycle) are very very common. Most ladies don't know they have even occurred. It has only been since supper sensitive tests have been on the market have we really begun to be aware so early that we are pregnant.

With miscarriages - it was only when I started my current profession that I realised how common MCs are. Most women in their life time will suffer one. It doesn't take away the pain in anyway. I don't mean to deminish the impact they have. What I am trying to say is that having a chemical and MC in no way means you will have any problems holding a baby to full term.

Sorry I have not explain very well but please DI not worry that you won't be able to have a baby. You will.

 

[dinidani]

thank you hunnie xx

 

[heavyheart]

but to be honest yh you are all pregnant or have a child for some one like me how only have hadmisscarage after misscarage without any baby or child none of yous can now how i feel as deep down all of yous would say im glad that wasnt me and if any of yous will disagreee stop me then as tobe completly honest if ANY AND I MEAN ANY of my sister was having a baby i only wished that their babys was completly helthly as i would not want them to go through what i have and i would lose any thing to see the look on any of my sisters face when they come home with their babys xx

i know your head is all over the place and your clearly angry but please do not take it out on the ladies here. Just as you claim no one really knows you or whats going on in your head that goes for you to, you dont know all the different losses and pain other women have gone through. It makes me very angry that you should lash out saying well all us who are pregnant or have children dont know. That is very disrespectful and belittling of the pain many women here including myself live with. Having a living child/ children does not make the pain of lossing another any better or easier to cope with so do not ever emply that again.

I wish you all the best but i agree with celtic, if you cannot respect the other women here and not lash out then i would also like you to take a break from this thread until you are ready to come back.

Again iam very sorry for your loss and the pain you are feeling.