Update - bfn boots own brand?! Please please someone give me hope - late bfp

[red_head]

Looks like I was right. Tests getting lighter. Devastated doesn’t even cover it.

 

[happycupcake]

Could it be diluted pee or that fmu isn't as good for you?

 

[Bevziibubble]

Maybe smu will work better

 

[red_head]

I’ve no more tests and I don’t want false hope. It’s obvious what’s happening and I shouldn’t have tried to fool myself it would be okay. Going to hospital in a bit as I’m under a consultant anyway. I don’t even know why but they’ve told me to come in and I feel so lost I don’t know what else to do so I’m just going to follow instruction! I know what’s happening, this isn’t the first time. It’s just so cruel it’s unbeliveable. I give up. I had given up!! I couldn’t take anymore pain and then this happens.

 

[Bevziibubble]

I'm so sorry I hope that you get some answers soon. Praying everything turns out OK

 

[robo123]

Hun I'm so sorry, the lines were looking good, my FMU was always rubbish. Hope the consultant can give you some answers xx

 

[Ask4joy]

I’m so sorry, Red. I don’t want to give you false hope but I do want to say 1. The tests are always darker once they start to dry so comparing a wet test to a dry test isn’t that helpful and 2. Once I thought my FRER looked lighter than the day before. I took another FRER from a different package and it was way darker. Some tests have different amounts of dye, so comparing 2 tests isn’t always reliable. I hope this is the case for you.

 

[red_head]

Just got back from the hospital. We where there for two hours, didn’t see a doctor as they were busy with maternity patients and I got upset waiting for so long as I know there isn’t actually anything they can do and it’s in the maternity ward and seeing everyone happy and hearing babies was just too much. They’ve taken bloods and given me a pot to put anything that comes out into, as they want to do genetic testing, Doctor will phone with results in a couple hours or so. But I’ve just got home and taken another test and it is a bit darker again (bottom one) and I’ve peed loads today. I don’t know whether that means this morning was a fluke, or that now is the fluke, it all feels so cruel. I just hope it’s okay but think I’m being so naive as anyone else in this position I would be thinking the worst. I’m not religious at all but I’m even saying a prayer!! I would give anything for this to be okay, and now I’m terrified of it was okay I’ve probably just ruined it by being so upset anyway! At least I’ve had a beta so depending on whether things get worse or stay the same, I can find out what’s happening in a couple days for sure.

 

[Ask4joy]

Red - I’m sorry you are going through all of this. That last test is way darker! I think either your urine was diluted this morning or the test didn’t have as much dye. I'm not Religious either but I am spiritual and I do believe in the power of prayer - I will say a prayer for you! xx

 

[ClairAye]

I'm sorry you are going through this. That bottom line is much darker, I have everything crossed for you.

 

[Bevziibubble]

The bottom test is definitely darker!

 

[MoBaby]

That last test is darker!! I think this am was lack of due or urine was too dilute. Either way progression is looking great!! Fx for you!

 

[hanni]

That bottom one is much darker! Try not to panic over 1 lighter test. Crossing my fingers for you x

 

[red_head]

Thank you all. I’m feeling so shell shocked. I think if I didn’t suffer with depression and anxiety I might be coping better but it just makes me think the worst, and struggle to cope. I just don’t want to get my hopes up. I guess all I can do is wait and see what happens.
I really appreciate everyone’s support.

 

[sevenofnine]

 

[Bevziibubble]

 

[SadakoS]

Just caught up on the whole thing. Everything crossed so tightly for you here. That bottom test is definitely darker. My fmu was always rubbish, I seemed to get my best result at about 11am!

 

[robo123]

Wow the last test is so much darker. Xx

 

[happycupcake]

Your most recent test is miles darker! I really hope your beta brings good news for you. I also suffer with severe anxiety and depressive episodes so I can relate to that. If you want to talk then you're welcome to PM me if you want

 

[red_head]

Thank you
I’ve just heard back from hospital - my hcg is at about 50 now which is in the low end of acceptable, so hasn’t really calmed me down. I’ve got to go back Christmas Day for a repeat, and will get the result that day, so it’s even going to be a good day or absolutely horrific. They can’t get blood out of me ever - today they tried from both elbows, and the back of my right hand before finally getting a tiny bit out my left wrist, which has now really bruised up my arm and swollen (see picture!), so I don’t think it’s going to be much fun on Monday! But will be worth it for good news obviously. It’s almost harder still having this sliver of hope as it means I can’t just try accept what’s inevitable.