Sticking Together Until We All Get BFP's!!!!

[snshine23]

Good luck mommysylvia and I am sorry for your loss.

Well, I got my answer loud and clear this morning...AF arrived. This was, by far, the worst cycle ever for me. I plan on calling my doctor's office today to talk about a game plan. Not necessarily to get pregnant, just to discuss my different symptoms and body pains. Something just doesn't feel right to me, especially with the spotting half way through my TWW.

 

[starryjune]

Sorry snshine23 I'm expecting AF early next week, too. I don't have any hope for a BFP, my chart and pms symptoms are pretty clear she's on her way. Maybe this summer...

 

[Michellebelle]

Sorry snshine.

Over here, no mature follicles. RE said he didn't think I would get a mature egg from what he saw, so now I'm on Clomid for the next five days. Here's hoping that works! DH hasn't gotten his SA back yet, so he's still a mystery!

 

[aidensmommy1]

Good luck mommysylvia and I am sorry for your loss.

Well, I got my answer loud and clear this morning...AF arrived. This was, by far, the worst cycle ever for me. I plan on calling my doctor's office today to talk about a game plan. Not necessarily to get pregnant, just to discuss my different symptoms and body pains. Something just doesn't feel right to me, especially with the spotting half way through my TWW.

I'm sorry hun!

As for the spotting, that may be a sign of low progesterone, which is an easy fix so IF anything is up, hopefully its that and not anything bad, and again thats IF there's anything wrong at all. I just wanted to mention that so u could mention it to ur OB. Def keep us updated! Lots of luck and dust to you!!!

 

[aidensmommy1]

Sorry snshine.

Over here, no mature follicles. RE said he didn't think I would get a mature egg from what he saw, so now I'm on Clomid for the next five days. Here's hoping that works! DH hasn't gotten his SA back yet, so he's still a mystery!

Good luck with the clomid hun! FX it helps, super quick!

 

[mdscpa]

Fx your DH's SA comes back great and hopefully your body will have a great reaction to clomid...... Looking at your previous, it seems like you're O'ing later than normal so maybe that's why no mature follicles yet but knowing you took femara it should have helped those eggs. Anyways, at least they gave you clomid. FX hun....

 

[aidensmommy1]

So, yesterday my BIG box of injection meds and progesterone suppository's came in. I'm going to be on Lupron, Gonal-F, Menopuer, & the HCG shot, followed by 2 shots of progesterone and then the suppository's. Omg, the needles for the HCG shot look so incredibly scary! I'm def having DH do those particular shots for me. The needle tips are 2 inches long, rather than the usual 1/2 inch long, like all of the rest of the syringes they sent me. In 3 days we'll be going for our injection class and then 2 days later we'll be starting .

We also picked out a donor yesterday. That was a hassle! The lady on the phone told me they had no "IVF" vials, only "ICI" or "IUI" vials so they told me they had no Caucasian donors available for me. I had to have the nurse call and she ended up having us set up to order the "ICI" vials and thankfully one of our first choices was available for that. Its $140 per vial EXTRA for the "ICI" vials, (total of $585each, not including fees/shipping) which really stinks. We just got our expenses and budget sorted out perfectly and then that happens. It'll be more then worth it, as long as it works! Adding thousands of dollars into the mix def makes it much scarier, for me anyway. Its alot to put down without the time to DEF achieve a pregnancy and the fact we have to buy 2 vials is stupid too. Everything happens for a reason tho and since I picked a donor out of the catalog, if I don't end up using both vials, they'll by one back for 50% the price I paid so I'm hoping just 1 vial ends up having plenty of healthy swimmers . FX!

Aidens sperm donor threatend to take me to court yest! He's never even been around for Aiden! Its been him in Jail or going to FL for 4 out of 7 yrs and the rest of the time, he was just busy with gfs or partying. Now that AIDEN doesn't want to see him, he thinks its a good time to "force" him to. BULLS**T!!! Ive always been a great co-parent and I ALWAYS let Aiden's "father" in and out of his life as he pleased, hoping he'd come to his senses before Aiden got too old and noticed stuff on his own. DH and I would let him stop by WHENEVER he wanted and he usually would just stop by and watch our TV, give aiden a hug, and leave. He's now 7 and HE see's what his "father" has been doing is not right, all on his own. His father thinks its "taught behavior"....How is it taught when Aiden originally told HIS SCHOOL how he felt about his father and I learned it from the school. And if it was "taught behavior", I'm pretty sure Aiden would have said "yes" to seeing his father the HUNDREDS of times that I have asked him over the past 3 1/2 months. He always says "I'm not ready." Its sad but I dont blame him! He feels security with my DH (something he has never had with a man before. He actually doesn't trust ppl because of his scum "father") and he's finally doing better in school and isn't so emotional. I KNOW if he goes through with court, he'll only he hurting Aiden by forcing him to see him and thats what I said to him but he cant seem to believe me. Aiden even told his "fathers" mother how he felt and said "I do not want to see him." but apparently hearing from everyone that he knows that A doesn't want to see him isn't enough proof for him. In my eyes, I think It should be up to Aiden at this point. His father has CHOSEN to leave Aiden out of his life MULTIPLE times, for whatever reasons he can think of, so why should Aiden be forced into his life & not be entitled to his feelings?! I believe it's only fair for him to have a say in the matter after everything his father has put him through. In the past, he was younger and didn't FULLY understand it all. Now he's 7 and is FAR from dumb. His father seems to think he's dumb, as he acts like Aiden could never ever express feelings all by himself, lol. I said to him, "The fact that u don't even know how smart your son is says enough about what kind of father you are." sorry for this rant, I'm very upset about this and its the absolute WORST timing to put this stress on me. IF aiden wanted to see his father, he'd be seeing him! I'm very afraid of a judge forcing him into visitation and as soon as his father finds a new girlfriend or interest, he's going to just walk out of A's life again so WHY DO THIS TO HIM!? ugh. I told his father he's very selfish for this. He's going to call today to hear how aiden feels in his own words. Aiden said "I want to tell him and then maybe he will stop texting us a gazillion times!" ...lol. I just hate that his father doesn't believe that Aiden could possibly not like him. Again, LOL. Thats what happens when you give a child nothing but broken promises for 7yrs! Now that he's not able to just come and go as he pleases, he's not happy about it. Too bad. Ugh, sry again for that rant! I woke early & haven't been able to sleep due to this and def had to let some feelings out!

Anyway, I hope you all have a great day!! Happy (early) Easter to everyone!!! I thought id say it now incase things get crazy and I dont make it on here tomorrow.

Good luck ladies!!!

 

[TTC74]

Mary - so excited you got your meds. And, I'm sure the situation with Aidens father will work out.

AFM - my chart is CRAZY this month. I've had 2 temp shifts. My temps are up to 98.3 and I dont think I've even Od yet!

 

[Jrepp]

Mary it seems like last year about this time he was doing the same thing and that fizzled out. I think he will drop it after a bit because it is too much work. It sucks that you have to deal with all of that crap on top of what you are going though with the ivf stuff. I am so intrigued by the sperm places separation of what the sperm is used for. Does it really matter what method of getting to the egg the sperm takes? I'm so excited for you to start this next week!

Ttc - are they monitoring you at all? I've seen some pretty weird clomid cycle charts so I'm not sure how it's supposed to go, but I bet it's freaking you out quite a bit.

 

[TTC74]

Ttc - are they monitoring you at all? I've seen some pretty weird clomid cycle charts so I'm not sure how it's supposed to go, but I bet it's freaking you out quite a bit.

They aren't monitoring my follicles. They're checking my follicle count at the beginning of the cycle, have me on a timed BD schedule, then the 21 day progesterone check.

 

[Michellebelle]

Fx your DH's SA comes back great and hopefully your body will have a great reaction to clomid...... Looking at your previous, it seems like you're O'ing later than normal so maybe that's why no mature follicles yet but knowing you took femara it should have helped those eggs. Anyways, at least they gave you clomid. FX hun....

I thought the same thing, but didn't mention it at the time! Either way, I hope this helps!

 

[aidensmommy1]

Mary it seems like last year about this time he was doing the same thing and that fizzled out. I think he will drop it after a bit because it is too much work. It sucks that you have to deal with all of that crap on top of what you are going though with the ivf stuff. I am so intrigued by the sperm places separation of what the sperm is used for. Does it really matter what method of getting to the egg the sperm takes? I'm so excited for you to start this next week!

Ttc - are they monitoring you at all? I've seen some pretty weird clomid cycle charts so I'm not sure how it's supposed to go, but I bet it's freaking you out quite a bit.

Thanks Jess . I'm hoping everything just pans out again like usual but this time Aidens grandmother is the one pushing his father so I have a feeling it'll be a big struggle but hopefully everything works out for the best, for Aiden. At this point, Aiden just needs his time and space & I really wish he'd understand that! Aiden spoke with him shortly after I posted earlier and he told his father how he felt and his father said, "I miss u" and he said back, "I kind of missed you, a little." (lol). Thats his fathers fault for NEVER been there. He told his father he didn't want to see him and im HOPING the fact that he heard it straight from Aidens mouth, maybe he'll back off now. If he took me to court, alls he'd be doing is fighting for a child who does not want it, whatsoever! Its not fair to the child. If he was active in his life for more then 10 months, total, I could see why he'd do it but Aiden doesn't even know him, other then that he constantly goes to jail or isn't around.
And yeah, last yr at this exact time he went to jail and he's been out since Dec 29th and everytime his mom doesn't get to see aiden when she wants, she tries to start trouble. She thinks she should have him every wkend even tho he's in school all week, yea, okay. She thinks she should have half custody, lol. She's crazy! Her son didn't sign the birth certificate at birth, not my fault, so they have no rights and that ticks her off and I don't get why. Ive always let her see Aiden, until recently when she said she couldn't promise that his father wouldn't just "show up". She said she can't prevent him from coming (lol) so if she can't promise AIDEN that his father will not show up, he doesn't want to go there and that in turn makes me not want him there. I get so sick to my stomach every Friday because I know they're going to call. Ugh. But we'll see what happens now that he spoke with aiden and Aiden told him how he felt.

As for IVF, I said the same thing about the vials! Whether they're used for IVF, IUI, ICI, it should ALL be the same price! IUI vials are the most expensive. Its their way of making money off the infertile I guess, which is sad. But besides all the financial dilemmas we've come across over the past month or so, we are very excited for the process to begin! I'm overwhelmed just Looking at all of the meds! Lol. I'm so afraid of messing it up but hopefully my meds confidence will go up after the injection class/meeting. I'm going to bring all of them to the appt so we can have the nurse write sticky notes to put on them for reminders & such. Its going to be alot! Hopefully our sticky bean will come out of it, first try! FX sooooo tight!!!! I cant believe its finally about to truly start! Yay!

 

[aidensmommy1]

Fx your DH's SA comes back great and hopefully your body will have a great reaction to clomid...... Looking at your previous, it seems like you're O'ing later than normal so maybe that's why no mature follicles yet but knowing you took femara it should have helped those eggs. Anyways, at least they gave you clomid. FX hun....

I thought the same thing, but didn't mention it at the time! Either way, I hope this helps!

Meds work differently for each person (ive been learning a ton about meds since IVF became an option) and so the famara may not have reacted well with ur body/hormones, where as the clomid may react much better with your body, you know? I'm excited to see how clomid works for u! hopefully ull get ur sticky bean this cycle but if for some reason the evil witch shows, def dont give up on clomid right away. They say to give it 3 cycles before you decide its not for you. Of course, many many women conceive the first cycle on it but to put what I'm saying in short, Sometimes it can take 2-3 cycles before that "golden egg" is released. Dont give up hope! Ive seen clomid work so many wonders for so many different women and I pray your one of them very very shortly!

 

[aidensmommy1]

Countdown-6 DAYS TO IVF MEDS! (I'm so nervous about all the horrid needles & many different meds!!) I will be on bcp for 3 days after starting the Lupron injections, so they'll be over-lapped for a few days and then I'll finally be done with the bcp! Yay! I have literally not stopped spotting since like 5 days or so into my first pack of BCP...Its getting very annoying and its been hard to get intimate due to the icky looking brown discharge. Ugh. I really hope it stops soon! Its been 30 days or so since it started. :sigh: FX for nothing but the best after all of this is over!

 

[Michellebelle]

Thanks Mary! Hearing things like that helps. Of course I would love it to happen first cycle, but if it only takes 3 tries, that would be plenty ok with me still!

Mary, that sounds really annoying about the BCP side effects. I'm so excited for you to truly start this process with the meds!

 

[TTC74]

Every day I wake up and think that my temp is going to drop in preparation for O. Every day it goes up instead. What is going on with my chart? It's got to be the clomid, right?

 

[jessilou]

Typing here as I feel like a big arsehole!! But just found out my really close friend accidentally got pregnant. She told me and I was happy for her , and am happy for her. But felt a little bit of me die inside. Sounds so stupid and I feel so ashamed, I wanted to go home and curl up in a ball but as I was at her house I had to smile and laugh the next few hours. I thought I was doing a good job, but my husband said he noticed my change in seconds. I hope she didnt pick it up!!

Haven't been on here for a bit as just getting over obsessed with it all. But feel like I cant vent to people in real life, as i feel like a selfish bitch.
So sick of being over emotional and depressed which is not like me.

 

[Jrepp]

Typing here as I feel like a big arsehole!! But just found out my really close friend accidentally got pregnant. She told me and I was happy for her , and am happy for her. But felt a little bit of me die inside. Sounds so stupid and I feel so ashamed, I wanted to go home and curl up in a ball but as I was at her house I had to smile and laugh the next few hours. I thought I was doing a good job, but my husband said he noticed my change in seconds. I hope she didnt pick it up!!

Haven't been on here for a bit as just getting over obsessed with it all. But feel like I cant vent to people in real life, as i feel like a selfish bitch.
So sick of being over emotional and depressed which is not like me.

It's alright to feel upset when you have been actively trying for something for so long and find out someone else was able to achieve your dream accidentally. The good news is you recognize how it made you feel so you are able to work past it. I still get upset when people tell me they are pregnant even though I am pregnant myself. The hurt doesn't really go away. It's great that you are able to come on here and vent to us. That's what we are for..lol.

In fact I am going to vent myself. Some of you may remember the drama with my sil 9 months ago when she sent out a mass group text letting everyone know they were expecting. So not only were we told via text message but we got about 100 congratulatory texts as well. Talk about adding salt to the wound. Well she informed everyone at my baby shower that she was going to be induced yesterday if she didn't go into labour first. Well she was induced yesterday but no one bothered to let us know that they had their little girl. We found out via facebook several hours after she had arrived (by chance when my mom asked if I had seen any pictures of her). I don't know if I am more angry or hurt. I'm so upset for my husband whose brother didn't have the common curtesy to send him even a text message letting him know that he had a new niece. If you have time to log onto facebook and do an update, you probably had enough time to send your baby brother a text message letting him know. I am so frustrated!! My husbands middle brother did the same thing back in September. We wouldn't have even known that they had their son if it weren't for a group text message about a week after he was born inviting everyone over to see their kid. I refused to go lol. My husband went and took them a little outfit and I was so angry with him for getting them a gift lol (especially after her whole baby shower drama). Right now I am so upset with my in laws that I want to hide all of my facebook info regarding having a baby from them and not let them know when we go into labor or have our son. If they felt the need to let facebook break the news to us then they won't even have the news broken to them at all.......but then I feel horrible for denying my husband his family seeing our baby.

 

[mommysylvia]

Okay so this is my m/c fade progression I guess you can say.... The middle is maybe a week ago and the bottom is today so I'm guessing that's from left over hormone. So now I know if it gets any darker in 1 1/2-2 weeks I'll be pregnant! I keep forgetting to start charting dang it lol

 

[jessilou]

Typing here as I feel like a big arsehole!! But just found out my really close friend accidentally got pregnant. She told me and I was happy for her , and am happy for her. But felt a little bit of me die inside. Sounds so stupid and I feel so ashamed, I wanted to go home and curl up in a ball but as I was at her house I had to smile and laugh the next few hours. I thought I was doing a good job, but my husband said he noticed my change in seconds. I hope she didnt pick it up!!

Haven't been on here for a bit as just getting over obsessed with it all. But feel like I cant vent to people in real life, as i feel like a selfish bitch.
So sick of being over emotional and depressed which is not like me.

It's alright to feel upset when you have been actively trying for something for so long and find out someone else was able to achieve your dream accidentally. The good news is you recognize how it made you feel so you are able to work past it. I still get upset when people tell me they are pregnant even though I am pregnant myself. The hurt doesn't really go away. It's great that you are able to come on here and vent to us. That's what we are for..lol.

In fact I am going to vent myself. Some of you may remember the drama with my sil 9 months ago when she sent out a mass group text letting everyone know they were expecting. So not only were we told via text message but we got about 100 congratulatory texts as well. Talk about adding salt to the wound. Well she informed everyone at my baby shower that she was going to be induced yesterday if she didn't go into labour first. Well she was induced yesterday but no one bothered to let us know that they had their little girl. We found out via facebook several hours after she had arrived (by chance when my mom asked if I had seen any pictures of her). I don't know if I am more angry or hurt. I'm so upset for my husband whose brother didn't have the common curtesy to send him even a text message letting him know that he had a new niece. If you have time to log onto facebook and do an update, you probably had enough time to send your baby brother a text message letting him know. I am so frustrated!! My husbands middle brother did the same thing back in September. We wouldn't have even known that they had their son if it weren't for a group text message about a week after he was born inviting everyone over to see their kid. I refused to go lol. My husband went and took them a little outfit and I was so angry with him for getting them a gift lol (especially after her whole baby shower drama). Right now I am so upset with my in laws that I want to hide all of my facebook info regarding having a baby from them and not let them know when we go into labor or have our son. If they felt the need to let facebook break the news to us then they won't even have the news broken to them at all.......but then I feel horrible for denying my husband his family seeing our baby.

THANKYOU FOR LISTENING!!. I am going to try put the upset past me and hopefully things get easier as we are close friends and I am excited for her. She also needs the support at the moment because they are not ready for a child.

Wow that family have been so horrible to you . What your SIL did was pretty damn self centered. Closer to the birth you can change your privacy settings so they can't see your time line . They need a taste of there own medicine so it seems.

Now the awkward part is my friends are like oh you need to have a baby now then they will be the same age , and I feel like saying thats what we are trying to do , at the moment I just say we have been so busy with the wedding and work that we haven't really decided when yet. They mean well and they are really nice I wish I could tell her , but am afraid it will make me more upset so going to keep it under wraps for now.