I'll be happy to pass on messages if you haven't. I'll PM you my number just in case x
good grief I feel like I've been "gone" for forever 
I've missed ya sweeties! I won't bore you with all the details...suffice it to say my Disney weekend was total crap. Dh and I still not on the best terms, and I deserve a damn new vacation! Only instead dh going away for the weekend with his buddy. Jerk. And instill haven't ov'd. Cd-freaking-23 now. I never have cycles this long. May have ov'd today but I thought I ov'd tues too and turns out I didn't. I'm just all messed up. Doc says all my new bloodwork came back "normal". I'm sick of that too. Not that I WANT something wrong with me, I just want to know what's going on and have a reason why the ivf didn't work and be able to fix it. 
anyway, I'm waiting for a new meds schedule from my nurse. I expect I'll get it pretty soon. I think I'll have to start bcp's again in november most likely. 
I just want to do something to recognize that they were here for a little while. I'm sorry I'm making my first post in a while a selfish one. We visited my baby brother over the weekend. His wife just had their 3rd lo... 6 days old. She's beautiful...so tiny and precious. I'm so happy for them but so sad for us too. I'm so afraid this next ivf won't work either. That devastation is too much to bear. .... I better stop or I'll keep getting more morose. 
for all of you. I'll get back to proper posting this weekend. 
so sorry your weekend away wasn't the great time you were expecting Also that is a lovely idea about the candles I know it will happen for you but its so hard to sit back and watch you struggle so much. xx
she can hardly breathe at night
Wednesday night she was up and down screaming til about 11pm but then luckily slept in her moses basket til about 7.30 but stirred a few times because she couldn't breathe through her nose. Last night she slept really well until 3.40 for her feed but then struggled to get back to sleep til 5am. I had her all kit out for the cold though. Calpol vapour plug, snuffle babes chest rub, karvol drops on her muslin and baby tixylix.
they are 2 peas in a pod aye 
have you tried any of the above meds for her? xxx
...how you feeling today?? any pains? plug? i neeeeed details!! to Kiera and Lilyane for their colds, poor girls!
all cleaning down stairs done, just gotta make the beds and thats it!
OH at work, connor playing nicely and Rhys asleep...he slept until 610am this morn..had 6oz and went back off until i got up at 730am...i dare say the little man would have slept longer if i didnt have to get up with connor...the 2 month old is better behaved than the 2 year old!!!!!!!!!(at night) connor had me up at 5 then 6(im sure it was him that woke Rhys) and then woke us at 730am....anyone want a mental 2 year old?? he's free!!! 
Hello my lovelies
Anyway, I'll get back into the groove here with my lovely ding dongs. I've had a really rough time of it emotionally. I bought 3 new candle sconces (just tea light size) to put on the wall for our 3 embabies and I haven't been able to bring myself to actually put them up.
Poppy, I'm praying for you sweetie. You've had a terrible week but it's going to get better love
Tink, coral, pc, babyd, MC, phoebs, hopes, china, Laura, babyhopes, sleeping, damita, caz, lew, Jenny... Massive
to you 
flippin men!!
It's my V day!!!
he had cancer which was only discovered 3 weeks ago and radiotherapy didn't work, life is so cruel.
and sorry about your sad news so to you xxxxxxx
I'm sure you'd miss him like crazy though terrible two's! glad Rhys is being good for you.xx sorry for the sad news about your friends dad Hope she's ok x
although I have had some saline spray so she can feed. Awwwwww our poor bubbas, and our poor sleep deprived bodies xxxxx
sending and some 
to get O happening x wish I could be so organised, I'm like a zombie sat in a pigsty. Not done a thing yet, only just had time to eat! Is it half term there? how about one of the toddler clock things to tell him its not time to get up? I used one for my youngest and it was a miracle! x
may have been nerves, some painful BHs along with her bloody pushing down got a bit of jelly CM on tissue this morning so fx'd something moving up there, bloody better be
come on Serenity!!! to wade!!! xxxxxx
I'm just so frustrated at so many different things right now. Did I tell you all my engagement ring broke a few weeks ago? Yup. Snapped right at the "shank" where the ring meets the prong settings to hold the diamond. I couldn't believe it. And dh never took it to the jeweler to get it fixed. I had to do it. So I went last night to pick it up and they forgot to have the size corrected for me (it was 1/2 size too big) so I STILL don't have it back. 
I'm just so freaking irritated with dh right now. Still no 
and since I did finally ov yesterday (at least I'm pretty sure i did), I'm of a mind to tell him no for the next few weeks anyway. Give him a taste of his own medicine. So sorry sweet Lilypie is sick hunni. I hope the meds getting on board will make a difference as you can see I'm still angry with dh and maybe angrier than I was before. I'm just so sick of always catering to his feelings and his wants and he won't do the little things for me that would mean so much. Like taking my ring to get it fixed for me. Maybe it is better he goes away this weekend. Right now I can hardly tolerate his presence. I think my hormones are still seriously out of whack from the ivf. and I have to go back on bcp. I HATE being on bcp b/c they make me crazy!! 
I'm sorry Connor giving you a hard time, little bugger he probably not wanting to give up attention with Rhys there now. As to the cursing not much you can do about it at that age but try to teach him it's wrong. Maybe a sharp "no" or very brief time out (just a minute or two) when he does it, if the ignoring it isn't working. That's probably what I would try next I keep thinking ok, I'll put it up today or this weekend or whatever and I go in there and stare at it a few minutes and then leave it alone. there's another baby shower this Saturday that I really SHOULD go to too. Ugh. I've been so bombarded with baby showers and new babies lately that I just don't want to but it would be rude if I didn't. I still haven't bought them a gift. Does anyone ever get tired of doing what's "right" so much? Sometimes I do. But then I feel guilty for even thinking like that. 2 weeks ago at another baby shower, 2 of the ladies there knew about the ivf and were shocked I'd even come. I just told them I can't stop living. Ya know? But it's been hard. The hardest though is the looks of sympathy. I mean, when they look at you with that expression that they feel sorry for you. Not that they really understand. So few people really understand what this has been like. I don't count you girls among that group. I hope Keira gets better soon too sweetie. Poor little thing. That is so hard to see when they get all congested like that and can't breathe. Scary sometimes too. I'm so sorry to hear about your friends dad. There's no rhyme or reason to it sometimes. My prayers are with your friend's family sweetie
and sounds like you're on your way now sweetie!!! Big hugs to you lovely! Little serenity will be here any time now! 
you could always send a gift if you didn't feel like attending? I'm sure they would understand. You are right I think dh should of taken the ring to get fixed. Maybe its good that you will have a break from him hope Lily gets some rest so she can get better quicker can't believe you are so close to having her now, can't wait for pics! Do you have a camera on your phone so you can send pics to Tink or MC>?
and your post are never selfish 
and to all
