hello girls, sorry i had a bad week last week, on a couple of accasions over the last 6 wks, iv seen blood in my bra, only a little bit, but still worrying, so last wk i finally got an appointment at the hos, i went on thur morn, my paper work said i was seeing a miss verik or something like that, when i got to the hos on the notice board it said she was on holiday, i was abit annoyed to say the least, then i found out that i was to see a man, oh boy did i lose it, im not a prude by no means but the idea of a strange man touching my bust really upset me, he came in n said something to me, unfortunatly i was rather a mess n didn't get wat he said so asked the nurse, n she said he had said "i would have to go home if i didn't want to be seen by him", between my h n the nurse they persuaded me to allow him to examine me, i had tears streaming down my cheeks has he press my boobs n then hate to admit this but he squeezed my r nip, then he stood back n said there's nothing there. get dressed, i sat up n grabbed my bra, i felt to humiliated as i felt he was calling me a liar, anyway fortunatly that morn i had worn a white bra, in the cup of the r side was a blood stain, so i basically flung my bra at him n said wats that then, the nurse spoke to him then turned to me n said i should get dressed n go down to xray for a mammogram n a scan, so still in tears i got myself sorted n h n i made our way to the other end of the hos, the mammogram was sooooo painful, the nurse was very kind, then had the scan, the nurse did my r side went backwards n forwards then asked if she could do the left to compare, i knew then that she'd found something different. after we were told to go away n return in 2 hrs, we did, saw the same dr, unfortunatly still couldn't quite understand wat he was telling me, so wen he wen i got the nurse to explain, she said they found a lump behind r nip, she said they would call me n make an app for me to go bk for a needle biopsy, then will have to wait 3 wks for the results, then go bk again 10days later for another mammogram, iv heard absolutly nothing since.
Then to top it all the fri before last i rescued a little cat, i found her down the alley nr my house, she was skin n bones, n her fur was all matted, i picked her up, took her home, took one of my own cats bed n put it near the radiator, i bought her the best food, n liquidized it so i could syringe feed her, i brushed her till her fur was smooth, my hubby had to shave her belly cos it was so matted, but we got her sorted, as by the sunday she was staggering around my kitchen n eating on her own, but unfortunatly it wasn't to last by the thur she had stoped eating again made an app at the vets for her for the fri, they asked me to leave her there, so they could do blood tests, an hr later got the call i'd been dreading, she had kidney failure n they said the kindest thing i could do was hav her put to sleep, it broke my heart, i cried so much. god only knows wat i'll be like wen i ever have to say goodbye to my own pets, xxxx
This wk well bloody af arrived yesterday in full flow n absolute agony, so back to taking clomid but hospital have upted me to 100mg, so fx for this mth, good luck girls, so sorry to go on xxxxx
I think you'll get your bfp by new years sweetie! At the very lastest a January positive! Sooo happy for you. I actually grinned and went all soppy to OH when I read you were actually trying.
I feel ok though so its not a bad one, thank goodness. So now I've got to take these massive horse pills for the next week. I told the Dr. that I am due for AF any day (supposed to be today, but nothing yet) and that I am hoping to TTC this next month. He did say that these pills will be out of my system by the time I start trying again, so no worries.
I'm a wreck. I just love you ladies so much and of course I'll pop on - paris I'mma stalk you on here! Oh please please let me get my 
I'm sure she's in animal heaven chasing that pidgeon and having a great time. At least she's out of pain now.
I'd imagine... That's the best thing about ntnp/ttc - the amount of action that we all get in the bedroom!
the pre-seed confusion sounds so like me -I wouldn't have a clue either!!
