Team Ding Dong... Bonking, Bumping, and Burping Along Together! ;-)

[poppy666]

CONGRATZ JENNY ON YOUR BABY GIRL ​

 

[Hopes314]

RANT. you dont have to read this!


its sooo cold here, the high for today is 57 and tomorrow the high is 45. with RAIN! its going to be crappy all weekend. luckily OH doesnt work again until monday so he will be home with me and mila monster all weekend. hopefully he will help a little. or at least try to spend time with me. he thinks im crazy and depressed and stuff because yes ive been crying a lot since mila arrived, however its a good bit because of HIM. he will go to work in the morning and come home around 6pm and then wants me to cook him dinner while he sits and watches tv. he will "watch" mila but pretty much after holding her a minute will put her in her bouncer or something and turn on the music to try to entertain her so he can relax and watch tv. then when dinner is done he will sit and eat his nice hot meal and relax while i deal with screaming mila and feed her and change her 93224 times and all that. then he brushes his teeth and all that and gets ready for bed meanwhile dinner is cold, i still have not eaten, and im still feeding and changing mila. i feel jealous of him that he gets to go to work and then come home and get a break and relax and have a warm meal and relax. i am losing weight like crazy because i DONT get to put her down and have warm meals and relax. grr! last night i made meatball hoagies and i sat with mila watching him relax on the couch and take his good old time eating his hoagie. of course he cant just hurry up for once so i could eat while the food is still warm huh. am i crazy!? i get that he is tired after work, but he DOESNT get that i might be tired?, and when he gets to come home and eat and have a break from work, i DONT get the break from work. i dont mind because i love mila, but HE COULD HELP, or be understanding, or AT LEAST not tell me im just crazy and depressed and that its all in my head. HE is going to make me crazy! he thinks i have it easier because im home with her, but he doesnt realize what its like to have leaky sticky boobs all day, be covered in gross chunky spit up 24/7, get peed on and not have time to shower to get it off, sleep for 2-3 hour durations rather than getting a good night's sleep, etc. Then he wants me to cook for him so he can watch tv and relax and not help me ever? come on. Oh, thats the other thing.. even on weekends when he is off and wont work for a few days, he STILL will sleep the whole night while i get up to change her and all that. Even if its 7am and she just wants changed and held, and i say "do you wanna get her" he says "not really.." and dozes off again. i knew id be doing most of the work with mila since im home, but he doesnt want to help at all.. ever! thats nice that hes tired and needs a break from work, but when do i get a break? for the first time in like a year i am actually sick and shaky and have a sore throat and all that, and im sure its because i havent gotten the chance to eat or take a relaxing shower or bath or leave the freaking living room. yes, im still not allowed to drive because of the stupid stuff that happened before the csec. when i wake up in the morning i am disappointed that its time to wake up, and by evening when OH gets home i am almost always crying. but i know what its like to be depressed and i also know that this is more OH disappointing me than anything. i have been telling him most evenings "i am jealous that you get to eat your warm meal and relax right now" and i even got angry enough a few times to say "it makes me hate you that you get a break from work but you cant give me one" yes harsh i know but its really getting to me. i talk to him abotu it but he just thinks im crazy because i previously was on meds years ago and it worked out well for me so now he just says "i cant wait til we go for your 6 week pp appointment so i can tell them about you and they can take care of it" what an ass, i dont need help like that, i need him to change a diaper or keep her from screaming for a half hour so i can take a bath without feeling the urge to rush out and console my screaming baby. ahh! OH and i usually have a really good relationship, i rarely complain about him. but he was so useless last weekend that i told him i didnt want to live here anymore. obviously i was being a little dramatic, but i was THAT upset. he acts like his life is so rough now that mila is here and like so much has changed for him, but i dont see how? he sleeps the whole night, he is able to sleep right through her screaming, he still gets his warm meals and hot showers and gets to have his normal after work routine. except now i bitch at him to help. is that what makes his life so hard, that i bitch at him to help? its not like he ACTUALLY helps, or loses any sleep over any of it. a few nights ago i was taking a shower while OH was watching her and i heard mila screaming and i figured he was trying to console her. i get out of the shower all stressed, walk into the living room, and mila is in her bouncer screaming and OH is sleeping through the whole thing. AHHH!

 

[puppycat]

Sorry Hopes but you're not doing yourself any favours by making his food for him when he gets home. You need to be strong and tell him he is more than capable of sorting himself and just deal with you and Mila.

As for the depression that to me sounds like bloody mind games. He needs a short sharp shock hun, you're his wife not his babysitter or maid. Give that man a wake up call!

 

[poppy666]

Agree with PC if you keep doing things for him he's only going to expect all the time and your gonna slip into a perfect candidate for postnatal depression

You need time out too, can you get any family to take Mila for an hour each day?

Sit your DH down and tell him there is 3 of you now and if he dont help out soon they'll only be 1 in the household 'Thats him' cruel to be kind kick his ass

 

[Damita]

Congrats Jenny!

Big hugs PK

Hope agree with the other ladies

 

[phoebe]

Sorry to hear about how life is Hopes. I could've written that myself a little while back. I agree with Pops and Pc on this. U are his wife, not his mother hunny. Tell him he needs to step up to the plate and get off his lazy butt. Failing that, just dont cook the food. I dont cook no more as it was too much trying to be wonder woman. let him do it and get him to to help with too. I feel ur pain there hun, and if he wants to play the PND game, then when ur 6 wk app comes thru, just say exactly what u have just told us. Then maybe just maybe he will get what ur going thru. Men are so pig headed and blind, it drives me mad. Cant he see that not only are u a FULLTIME mummy but ur also getting over a c-section, which is traumatic enough. Try and make time for urself lovely, u need to look after urself because if u end up becoming so poorly, u wont be able to look after ur DD. U will get there hun but in the same token u also need to drive home ur concerns,fears and needs to ur husband. Take care hunny xxx

 

[phoebe]

Congratulations on ur pink bump Jenny! xxx

 

[caz & bob]

congrats on jen x x x

 

[Jenny Penn]

Yes I am having a little girl

DH and i are thrilled to bits Sorry i didn't get on sooner we ended up going out for a meal with my parents and then i went to asda and bought pink clothes

I know i said i was going to stay team yellow but when the lady scanned my little princess's bum it was so obvious that i just cried out 'OMG IT'S A GIRL' to which the sonographer said to my husband 'So much for keeping it a surprise' lol Now DH thinks he should get to name her since i ruined the surprise! He had a little tear in his eye looking at his little girl

I will post pics but will probably be tomorrow now ladies as i am so tired and have terrible backache.

Thankyou all for your congrats on here and on fb

 

[babydream]

HAPPY 30th BIRTHDAY MC!!!​

Hope you have a good day hunni XX

 

[babydream]

How is everyone??? PK, any news???

Jenny, your story at the scan made me shed a tear lol, i'm chuffed for you xx

Hopes, i agree with the other, put your feet down hunni, you can't carry on like this, hugs xx

Hi everyone, it's a gorgeous day outside but i'm too tired. Went to asda, dh is cooking and i'm off to bed for a nap before my night shift. Catch up later xxxxxxxxxxx

 

[pk2of8]

Aw Jenny that's so wonderful hunni can't wait to see the piccies!!

Hopes, I agree with all theother girls and I'm in pretty much the same boat with dh right now. Obviously not over a baby but we had an argument yest morning b/c I was upset about this whole mess and just needed some support and wanted him to hold me for a few minutes. The freakin twat had the gall to tell me he was too tired. And then when (of course) I became angry about his response and told him so, then it turned into a huge fight about how I need too much and why can't I just be positive and why isn't he enough and I've just been "obsessed" with having a baby this whole time and I've ruined our sex life, blah blah blah. I'm still angry. Men are the MOST inconsiderate, insensitive, boorish, thick-headed, mulish, selfish, two-faced, prideful, arrogant pieces of sh*t in the whole of the universe sometimes. Obviously I'm not over it. Normally my dh is wonderful...don't get me wrong but when he pulls this kind of garbage, man it is a major fail. Like EPIC FAIL. so I hear ya. I totally get where you're coming from (as I'm sure we all do). Talk about being dramatic...I actually took off my engagement ring and gave it back to my dh yesterday along with every other piece of jewelry he's ever bought me (except for my wedding band). I told him I don't want it back unless he can give it back and mean it that he loves me. Overreacting? Oh sure. but we'll see what he does to make up for it. The jerk STILL hasn't got me a birthday present from AUGUST and he's been going on and on for over a week now about buying himself a nook!!!! He's not one to make a big show of making up, but damn he picked the WRONG time to start throwing out that kind of BS at me. I'm sure the real heart of the matter is more about his statement that showed his insecurity about whether or not he's enough for me...I've already told him he is, but that this is SOOOOO hard. He's just not giving me time to grieve. Ugh. I'm still so mad at him I could spit.

So now that I've gotten some of that verbal vomiting out of the way ....... Well still no af. Today is 17dpo, af is 4 days late today. I asked about the prog, and apparently, it doesn't actually "prevent" af, but if you're not preggers it will delay it. So still no wiser on that front if this is a real af delay due to pg or just due to the prog supplement. I really don't have any hope girls. I don't "feel" pregnant. It's sweet of you all to say I'm strong. I'm so not. I just can't bear to see another bfn. So Monday it will be unless af starts first. I'd much rather that than have to look at another bfn test. On a confusing note, my temp went back up this morning. 98.38.

 

[pk2of8]

Flipping criminy lost my whole damn post again and I had a fantastic rant going to empathize with hopes

Suffice it to say, hopes, I feel your pain hunni. Dh's can be complete jerks sometimes. Including mine at the mo. but my lost post said it way better because I had a whole list of great adjectives to fit their black hearts and cold-hearted souls worthy of a very slow and painful death.

Jenny, so happy for you and your little princess hunni and I can't wait to see piccies!!

Well no af here yet. I am 17dpo today, making today as af 4 days late. I'm still not hopeful though. I asked about the prog and found out that it doesn't so much prevent af as it can just delay it, but even then not in all circumstances so it's just impossible to use the "no af" sign as a positive predictor at this point. and to make it more confusing, my temp went back up today. 98.38. I don't know what to think anymore. I don't "feel" pregnant. thank you girls for saying that I'm strong I'm so not though. really I just can't stand to see another bfn. I'd much rather have af show up than look at another bfn test.

 

[pk2of8]

Ohhh check it out!!!!! My original post did make it through cyber limbo!!!!

 

[puppycat]

Pk i mean this with the utmost respect _

Ahhh you have a fab way with words. Ok the actual words were very sad but jeez you made me giggle - especially 'obviously i'm not over it yet'

I wish we could get xray vision and know what's going on in there. 5dpo here

 

[caz & bob]

girls got a nice + opk today see what tomorrows is like woopp baby mya is doing good they have took her off antibiotics and put her in a cot she will soon be home new born clothes are to big on her that how tiny she is she guzzling bottles down to pk hope she stays away and you get a nice bfp hun x x x

 

[pk2of8]

Yay caz for +opk!! keep up the bd'ing sweetie!

Pc, no offense taken whatsoever. I was actually quite amused with myself after I typed it all up. it is its own therapy of a sort. dh is starting to pout and grovel now (via text b/c he's at work). I'm going to go spend money. That always makes me feel better and by the time dh gets home tonight, he should be ready to fix it. He better anyway. one more week (give or take) before testing for you!!

 

[coral11680]

very quick post as I'm extremely tired. I've been at the seaside all say with the family enjoying our Indian summer we are having!

PK you really do have a great way with words as I've said before and I really enjoy reading your posts, the happy and sad ones of course I don't mean I enjoy reading about when your sad, oh you know what I mean! I'm crap as you can tell
Just wanted to say big for dh being a selfish man and so glad af is here I'm quietly positive for you and hope to see a blaring soon!

Hopes I def understand where you are coming from, men really do have to be told most times. He needs to know how you feel big

Jenny congrats on your bump look forward to pics! x

 

[puppycat]

Yeh PK i'll be testing on the 8th, my grandparents anniversary (which means another cake to bake...)

 

[pk2of8]

Thank you coral sweetie I do understand what you mean

Mmmmmm....caaaaaaaakkkkkee...that sounds sooooooooo good right now pc. Dang I wish I had some....